My Boyfriend's Friend
by Lady Imp
Summary: Usagi begins to fall for an old friend. What will she do? R rating for sex, drugs, and language.
1. The Beginning of a Problem

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Sailor Moon. -Lady Imp  
  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Prologue: The beginning of a problem  
  
I've got a situation. You see, I have a wonderful boyfriend. We were introduced by a mutual friend. Well he was a mutual friend until my boyfriend and I got really close and wanted our privacy. So he went his own way, bitter at the fact that his friend chose me over him, or is it because I chose his friend over him... hmm. It's really funny how fickle relationships are. My boyfriend is Seiya, and his friend was the now trash talking enemy of mine, Mamoru.  
  
Ah, Mamoru, the memories. Mamoru and I date back to high school. Needless to say, he was hot stuff, but we were friends and never crossed that line. It was hard to even attempt to cross it when he was dating another girl in school. So he introduced me to Seiya to occupy my time. Hehe, and did he! Seiya was hot. He was mysterious. He wanted me. I definitely wanted him too. So my crush on Mamoru faded, and slowly did our friendship to the point were he was known as Seiya's friend, even though he was my friend way before I met Seiya. It's hard to forget the good times with Mamoru however. The skipping of school. Underage alcohol binges. The walks in the park talking about life, how I use to swing on the swings on top of him and look in his eyes and- shit! Are your starting to get the gist of my problem?  
  
So much stuff has changed since we stopped being friends. I went from calling me his cool chick to a bitch. Me a bitch. I think not. He was an asshole. How could he say I was a bitch? I mean really, he knew me first. We were so close people would mistake us for having relations. Soon after our falling out. He left town. I miss him sometimes, but what he has said has hurt me more than anything else in my short 22 years.  
  
That's the pass. Seiya and I have been going strong for almost 4 years now. I wouldn't mind being his wife, of course after we finish college. Until then, I'm going to enjoy my college years. Party, drugs, alcohol, and sex. As a matter of fact, there is a "rolling" party tonight, and Seiya and I are going to dance the night away.  
  
The phone rang. That must be Seiya calling with the update on the party.  
  
"Hello", I answered the phone is a sing song voice. I was right, it was my baby boy!  
  
"Usa, baby, don't turn me on like that." He growled into the phone. You have no idea what that man does to the body!  
  
"Mmm, really, and why is that?" I teased him.  
  
"You do want to make it to the party tonight right?", he said knowing I was a social creature.  
  
"Of course. So what it is baby?", I asked ready for him to come and get me.  
  
"Were all going to meet at 10 at Andrew's place. It's going to be the usual and two other people."  
  
"Ah really? Well I'm game I'll see you at 9:30?" I asked, ready to get my party on.  
  
"Yes you will baby, maybe a little earlier huh?", he said in his super seductive voice.  
  
"Mmm, maybe."I responded wantonly.  
  
"Oh by the way, you'll never believe who's back in town."  
  
"Who?", I asked nonchalantly.  
  
"Mamoru! He's coming to the party and he's bringing his old girlfriend from high school, Beryl", Seiya said into the phone semi-excited.  
  
I choked, "Oh really? That's good I guess. Ahem, well baby, I'll see you in a little?"  
  
"Sure thing hot mama!", with that he hung up.  
  
My face burned red. How dare he show his face among my friends after all that he has said about me. I pulled out a black T-shirt halter I had made that said "Trulee Blazin" in pink neon and found a pair of stretch denims and flip flops (The best damn shoes in the world) That son of a bitch. I refuse to let him ruin my night. I go, I roll, I have fun and ignore him.  
  
Damn I wish the night could have been that simple.  
  
So what do you think? Is it worth continuing? Reviews please! Lady Imp. 


	2. The Party

OK, I don't get it. Write a story you think is a classical masterpiece and get minimal reviews. Write something sleazy and down right scandalous and you want more. Well wish granted. Thank you for those who reviewed. (Ruby Moon, Gucci Lady, DonJames, Silver Wolf, Panda, unknown, Leeza, *^__^*, Bunni, and Videl621) I means a lot when people show appreciation and interest in someone's work. I will try not to let you down! Now on with the story. By the way Andrew is Motoki. Sorry for the mistake.  
  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 1: The Party  
  
Seiya arrived to pick me up at about 9:15, but I was already outside and was not in the mood for "hanky panky". Well that was until he covered my mouth with his wet sweet kisses.  
  
*20 minutes later*  
  
"Not bad for a quickie eh, Usa?", he panted into my ear. Man he was so good. I was almost ready to just lie in bed with him for the evening, but it was a rolling party and every one was going to be there.  
  
"Mmm, baby, you know how I like it."I said getting up and slipping back on my clothes. I looked at the clock. Shit it was 9:50. "Baby, lets head out."  
  
We got into the car and headed toward Motoki's place. Luckily it was a little less than 15 minutes there so there was no rush. When we arrived, Seiya took me by the hand and we began to walk up to the apartment. I was starting to get my anxious "I'm going to roll" feeling.  
  
"Pre-anxiety Usa?" he asked. He knows me so well. I nodded and gave him a kiss on the lips.  
  
"You know me too well, you know that?"  
  
"I try to make it a point." He winked at me. Damn he was fine.  
  
I knocked on the door and it flew open with Motoki looking around like a mad man.  
  
"Oh it's just you", Motoki said with disappointment.  
  
"I love you too Toki ", I said with sarcasm dripping in my voice. He smiled and leaned in to give me a hug. He was so sweet.  
  
"We're still waiting on the rolls. Yaten said he'd be hear by 10 with them, but its 10:12 and no sign of him yet. But hey come on in." He stepped aside and let Seiya and me enter.  
  
"Hey guys", I said cheerfully. I scanned the room carefully to see who all had arrived as of yet. Ami and Ryo, Rei and Yuuchiro, Makoto and some random guy that always reminds her of her old boyfriend, Minako and Motoki, Taiki, and Seiya and I. Hmmm, it seems like the only people missing is Yaten, Mamoru, and Beryl. I could live without seeing the last two. We sat down on the couch and started a group waiting session. It's funny how these go. Everyone is so anticipating the rolls, that no one knows what to say. I heard some laughter coming from the kitchen. I've heard that laugh before, its Mamoru's! Hearing his voice I began to shift uncomfortably in my seat. Sure enough though, here comes Mamoru around the corner with Beryl, laughing merrily.  
  
"Seiya!" He shouted out to my boyfriend. Seiya stood up to embrace him and Beryl. We actually had no problem with her, she was nice enough. Seiya turned around and started giving me that be nice look. So I stood up, gaining my composure, and walked towards the happy reunion.  
  
"Beryl, oh my God, how good to see you!" I said plastering a smile on my face. Like I said, I had no problem with the woman, she never did anything to me.  
  
"Usagi.", Mamoru said my name in acknowledgment  
  
"Mamoru" I simply stated back. Two can play that game I thought. We returned to our seats and began to try to wait out the rolls. Mamoru was mostly talking about what he did while he was away. I didn't pay attention and wasn't going to give him any thought. Damn he was still hot though. Some things I guess never change. I turned over to the girls and began to blab about school and everything that has been going on since we talked on the phone-- earlier today. Hey in a girls life, something is happening every moment and it is most important to keep you best girls updated.  
  
"So Usa, are you going to be able to maintain yourself around Mamoru tonight?" Mina asked me. I looked at her and read that she knew he was going to be here. They all knew it.  
  
"You knew didn't you?" I said accusingly. "You all knew and didn't tell me that that rat bastard was going to be here tonight? I was whispering harshly to the ladies I called my friends.  
  
"Well yeah, "Ami chimed in "Look Usa, it happened a long time ago, let it go. Just have fun."  
  
"He called me a---" the door bell cut me off. The room fell silent as Motoki approached the door. I began to look over towards Seiya because I felt someone watching me. I turned to look and it was Mamoru! But he shifted his eyes just enough to make me unsure of my assumption.  
  
"YATEN MY MAN!" Motoki roared as our hero walked in the door smiling.  
  
"Oh what kind?!" Mako squealed.  
  
"Red VW's baby!" Yaten exclaimed proudly at his accomplishment. I jumped up. VW's were my absolute favs!  
  
"So how much?" I asked mouth watering.  
  
"I got an excellent deal! Ten a pop!", Yaten said  
  
"Oh you are damn good Yaten, damn good." I said. Hey you got to give credit where it is due. I am an excessive roller to say the least. I NEVER take less than four, and tonight was going to be no different. As far as I knew, everyone in the room was taking 4 as well. We all cashed out and each took two to begin our night. Eight hour orgasm, here I come.  
  
"So.." I said, trying to make the wait for the pills to kick in a little easier.  
  
"So.." Everyone said back. We all laughed then it kind of died down again. I turned to look at Seiya to give him a kiss again. Damn it! Was Mamoru looking at me again?!? I was getting thoroughly ticked off at this guy. I mean who does he think he is. What the hell is his-Whoa! The pills have just kicked in. The tell tale smile began to creep across my face. My eyes were starting to glow.  
  
"Usa", Mina called to me. I slowly turned my head to hers, and saw the same smile. I grinned bigger. Tonight was going to be good.  
  
After about another 20 minutes, everyone was effectively rolling. We were sitting on the couch soaking in the good feeling. I couldn't help but to have my eyes wonder over to Mamoru. I was still hurt by him, but the empathy of the pills made me want to just hug him. And so I did. I got up and started to walk over to him. "Good to see you again" I smiled at him and gave him a big hug. Oh God did it ever feel good. I felt like I was wrapped in a cloud floating in the sky. Soon the music started playing. It was light, and I liked it. I'm pretty sure I've heard this before. I looked back up a Mamoru, who's eyes were fixed on me intently. I smiled. "Hey hun, who is this?" I asked starting to feel the softness of the music as it began to build up.  
  
"Orbital" he said. His voice sounded so husky. "Halcyon" he finished. All of a sudden the music kicked in and I parted from Mamoru. I looked around I saw multiple sets of glow sticks, blacklights, and a strobe light focusing on a corner with a fan. I made a grab for the bright pink glow sticks and headed towards the strobe and fan. I let the music take control. I began to sway my body and to just let my arms flow in a pattern. I turned around and saw Mako doing the same. Man she was good. Her long legs and slender body looked so hot under the lights, and man could she work those green glow sticks. I walked up to her and gave her a hug. She felt so good. Her breast were so soft, it was incredible! I looked up at her and she gave me a small kiss on the lips. OK, so maybe we get a little friendly while rolling, but I personally prefer the stick to the lick. Get my drift? I smiled back at her and continued to dance.  
  
I turned again and there was Beryl walking towards me in the strobe flash. She started dancing next to me. She was an excellent dancer, and I could tell she was getting ready to blow up hard. So I reached into my pocket and grabbed the Vick's Inhaler, never leave home with out it, and opened it and put it in her mouth while blowing on it from the other end. Mako joined in and soon the other girls joined in to help get the girl to heaven. I was working the Vick's, Mina and Ami were massaging the hell out of her body, while my two fav vixens Mako and Rei danced around her with green and red glow sticks. Before long, Beryl was moaning in extreme pleasure than her body convulsed once more before she was sent to heaven. I stuck a pacifier in her mouth so she would grit the hell out of her teeth. We stood up and left her to wallow in the pleasure.  
  
I looked over at the guys, Toki was workin it real good. I felt like just going over there and dancing my heart out with him. People say when I roll, I have this really seductive strut I do. I never notice it though, truthfully I think I look like a rabid animal. I started to make my way over to the guys to have some fun and dance with them. Before I could make it to Motoki, Seiya grabbed me and put me up against a wall and gave me the most passionate kiss in the world. I returned it fully. There is nothing sexual about rolls, pretty much sex is far from the brain considering that like I said, it's an extended orgasm, but when Seiya touches me, it feels so good. He began to massage my body and called the boys over to come and help. I had a group massaging me and I had a few on the sticks. Then suddenly I felt the Vick's slide into my mouth. As I opened my eyes to see who was administering the inhaler, blue stormy eyes looked deep into mine. I felt as if my soul was being searched. My eyes fluttered, I began to blow up hard. The last thing I remembered was his eyes burning into mine. The eyes of Mamoru. I reached out and grabbed him and I slid to the floor. "Oh My God!" I cried out. "Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm" it felt soooooo damn good. I remember hearing Taiki, "Man she is blowing the fuck up!"  
  
I hopped up from where I was sitting when I regain conscious enough to realize where I was. Some where along the way, the CD stopped, so I went to my hand bag throwing everything all over the place until I found what I was looking for. DARUDE! I headed to the CD player and fumbled around until the door opened and placed in the CD and pressed play. "Blow ya mind" began to blast, and I received shouts of approval. I picked up my glow sticks and began to rave hard again. The beat was moving all through my feet. My blonde hair had falling from my bun I had it in and was flowing down my back as I swayed and moved to the beat. Ami came over with her blue glow sticks and was matching me equally. She was absolutely gorgeous. I gave her a big hug and we continued to dance. I was feeling so good. I looked around to locate Seiya. He was talking to Mamoru. I tried to read his lips, but my eyes had a serious case of the wiggles, and I could not focus on anything. My eyes dropped for a second and I looked back over at Seiya. He nodded his head in approval to what him and Mamoru were talking about. I blinked again. The music was getting intense. I was having a hard time trying to keep up with what was going on. A key point in the fact that you were going to blow up again. Just in time for the sirens in the song. Oh damn, I'm gone.  
  
"Let's drop the last two!", Taiki exclaimed. Everyone agreed. We took our baggies out and took the last of the pills. I began to dance again. From somewhere a hand rested on my shoulder and turned me around. Those eyes I thought. Mamoru moved in closer to my face and just missed my lips as he whispered in my ear.  
  
"Let me blow you up.", damn his voice. I couldn't resist him. I never could so why try now. I nodded my head as he backed away and fixed his eyes on mine. He put two speakers on the ground and put a pillow in between them. I looked at him like he was crazy. He then took the Vick's inhaler and turned to me and began dancing with me. I looked around for Seiya. "No worries Usa, I have his approval." Did he just call me Usa? "Ecstasy" began blaring from the speakers in the apartment.  
  
"Lets dance then.", I said. I began to move with him to the music. He was quite in tune to my moves. He grabbed my arms and began twirling me around. It was such a sensation! I began to lose my footing as I began to blow up. I felt his hand running through my hair. Massaging my scalp. He began to hold my eyes with his. I felt like I was floating. I reached up to grab his head to return the favor. The music started to intensify and my eyes were wiggling and I couldn't see anything. I grabbed onto him tighter and he began to gently vibrate my body. I was going to heaven and fast! I began to slowly lose balance, but he wouldn't let go of me. He held on to me tight, as I held onto him. I didn't want to let go. I was blowing up. The music began to pulse and my hands fell back as I completely blew up. He laid me on the pillow between the speakers, straddled me, and began to give me Vick's therapy. I was loving it. He then began to massage me. All over. Everything. I wanted him to keep going.  
  
"For what it's worth, I missed you." he whispered in my ear. I grabbed onto him and pulled him down on me in a hug.  
  
"I missed you too." Before any eyes could have been drawn towards us, he got off me and I stood up. I looked in his eyes once more they were crazed with xtc and so were mine. "Let me return the favor", I said as I began to walk towards him.  
  
"You know you have this sexy cat prance about you when your rolling" he said eyeing me.  
  
"Yeah, I get that a lot" I smiled at him. I then grabbed him and place him on the pillows. I began by taking my hair and slowly tossing it all over his body. The silkiness was almost more than he could bare then I grabbed glow sticks and began to dance and twirl them over him as I continued to straddle him. He was blowing up. He grabbed a hold of my hips when he was almost there. I put the inhaler in my mouth leaned down and began to blow. He was so gone. I sat back up and dropped the Vick's from my mouth. I looked down at him. He was completely gone into the feeling. His eyes opened and looked into mine. Emotions started to flow that were pent up inside of me. The happiness, the admiration, the hurt, all of it. He placed his hand behind my head and drew me in closer to him. Our faces were getting closer and closer, our lips mere centimeters away.  
  
"Mamo, check this out", came Beryl's voice. I broke out of my trance and got up from Mamoru, I smiled at him quickly and made a break for Seiya. I had this incredible urge to kiss. So I decided to take it out on Seiya. I kissed, but it was not enough. I wanted more. Or maybe I wanted someone else's kisses.  
  
For the remainder of the time until about 4:00am when Seiya and I decided to make the party private back at my place, I avoided too much contact with Mamoru. Maybe it was my altered state of mind, but nothing good can come of us getting close to each other again. It was dangerous territory. But it was a territory I wanted to explore.  
  
Seiya and I got into his car and began the careful drive back to my place. It's hard to drive when you mind keeps drifting. One thing about rolls is that it makes you feel like the world is your friend and you can say anything. "You know Seiya, I never realized how much I missed Mamoru."  
  
"Really? That's good, because I invited Beryl and him to eat out with us tomorrow night or tonight, however you want to take it" he chuckled to himself.  
  
"That's cool." I said as I began to come down slowly from my rolls. Whenever I come down it's a weird feeling of drifting from world to world. I always start talking to people who aren't there. Seiya thinks its cute. But I really think there are other levels of the conscious that we communicate one. I'm just more sensitive to them.  
  
"We're here my love" Seiya announced to me. We skipped and danced our way to my apartment merrily. When we were inside. He stripped me of my clothes, broke out the lotion, and began to give me a thorough massage. I began to drift to sleep. My mind was not on Seiya, the massage, or another world. It was remembering the stormy blue eyes that it would not let me forget. I went to sleep anticipating my next meeting with Mamoru. Was I wrong?  
  
OK, did you like it? More to come soon. Please Review, and thanks again to those who did!-Lady Imp. 


	3. Confusion Sets In

Hi guys. Thanks again for all the reviews I have received so far, and to the new reviewers KittyKat and Angelblood. You guys are awesome to say the least. I'm trying to update this story daily, and so far so good eh? Also, for people with questions about the story, you can leave them in the review section, or go to and ask there. (Leeza, the answer to your question is in there) I will post answers to questions there so I won't spend to much time sitting here at the beginning of stories talking too much as I am now. I hope you all continue to enjoy.  
  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 2: Confusion Sets In  
  
As I woke up I had the urgent need to pee, but just couldn't muster the energy to get up and do so. Maybe it was because Seiya's weight was baring me down. I flopped my nude boyfriend over and lazily stretched as I walked towards the rest room. Flashes of the party last night was still fresh in my head. I looked at the clock to see what damage has been done to a fine Saturday. Hmm. noon, not to bad. I've done worse like sleep a whole day and wake up starving.  
  
I walked in the kitchen to find anything to eat. I opened the refrigerator to see if something had magically appeared since yesterday. Damn why is the only thing I ever seem to have in the fridge is damn cheese! I walked over to the pantry once again hoping something was there. SALTINES, I though triumphantly. Better than nothing. Then my brain began to really tick, saltines and crackers. I am genius I thought as I headed to plop on the living room sofa to turn on the TV for background purposes. I glanced over to my left to see what was that damn blinking. My mind is always fried after one of these drug excursions. It was the answering machine blinking and blinking and blinking, and blinking. There were 5 messages. I could tell you already who four of them were. I pressed the light to listen to the four drug crazed chicks that were my friends.  
  
"Usa, Usa, My gyal Usa, man so good, must talk later call me k?", came Mina's on the machine. I smiled. The message had to be right as I began to drift off. BEEP!  
  
"Hey Usagi girl. Man, we got to get together and chill this afternoon, some girl stuff. It's about 9:30 right now, and I still haven't slept. That always happens. Any who give me OK?", asked Makoto. I think I heard random mumbling of a guy in the background off her phone. BEEP!  
  
"Hey Usagi, Mako just called, she wants us to go out, I thought I might give you a call to and see what was up. Love ya!," That was Ami's sweet voice. I think I'll give her a call back. In a little bit. BEEP!  
  
"Usagi, girl we need to talk. What exactly- mmm hold on, wow I can't believe I'm still blowing up! Any ways, what the hell was with you and Mamoru last night, I mean seriously? You guys did not look like enemies to me. He even asked for your number.I of course gave it to him. I mean check out my state of mind right now. Any how I need to get sleep now. Call me k?", Rei ended. Wow she's really a motor mouth on the phone. Hmm, Mamoru wanting my number? BEEP!  
  
"Usagi, this is your mother dear. I hope you didn't forget your father, Shingo, and I are coming to visit today. Well be there about one. See you then honey. Bye!", OH SHIT! My parents how could I forget? I looked at the clock.ETA 15 MINUTES? OK Usa think. You can get through this. Maybe they will be late.Man my father is never late. Oh God. I reached for some sweats that were tossed on the couch and through on a random T-shirt. I fluffed pillows, stuck dishes in the washer and manage to get a vacuum in before the door bell rang.  
  
I walked to the door. I still had the effects of the drug running through my body. Man please let me play this off, PLEASE. I swung open the door. "Mom, Dad, Shingo! How are you guys?!", my eyes begin to wiggle oh no not now. "How was your drive?" I stepped aside to let them in and closed the door and headed to the couch.  
  
"It was great honey. All thirty minutes of it.", my dad said.  
  
"Hey Usagi, what's with the walk?", damn you Shingo. He knew what was up. Little bastard always trying to get me in trouble.  
  
"Shingo be nice. Knowing your sister she has probably just woke up." My mom said in my defense. Good 'ol mom. I noticed my dad scooping out the place. He was probably looking for signs of boys. BOYS! Oh God. And as if on cue, Seiya walks stark naked out of my bedroom!  
  
"Oh dear!" my mom said turning her head.  
  
"Busted big time" my brother gloated.  
  
"Usagi!" came my dad's roar.  
  
"Umm Mom, Dad, you remember Seiya right?" I was toast.  
"Oh my God, are you serious?", laughed the still hyped Makoto. She really thought my early afternoon ordeal was that funny. I was still overly embarrassed at how things played out.  
  
"Yes I'm serious. My dad even gave me the birds and bees again, then came back from the store with an "I love you dear daughter card" and a mega pack of condoms!" My cheeks were staining pink. However the girls couldn't get enough of the story. The majority of our time spent was laughing at me, but most of the time everything happens to me. I looked at my wrist watch. It was almost five. "OK ladies, I have a double date tonight. I have to get going"  
  
"Double date? With who? It's certainly not one of us.", said Mina somewhat offended. I really didn't want to say who with, but if I wanted to get out of there I would have too. Rei gave me a semi-knowing look.  
  
"With Mamoru and Beryl." I said hushed.  
  
"What?!?" came everyone's, save Rei, reply.  
  
"I knew it!", Rei said. "Usagi you better be careful. Seiya's good to you. Don't get caught up!"  
  
"Whatever Rei, It's not even like that. I'm trying to be nice, and Seiya invited him. I really just want Mamoru as a friend back. Nothing more. We never had anything between us to begin with."  
  
"Yeah," Rei began, "I use to watch you guys, and it was hard to tell if anything was going on between you two, even if he had a girlfriend"  
  
"Haven't you ever had a close friend before?"  
  
"Yeah, but I slept with him and we lost everything." The girls looked at Rei with sympathy.  
  
"Look Rei I'm not blind to what I have. Mamoru was a friend and that's all. What's wrong with wanting a friend back?" I started to get up. I refuse to believe I had or still had feelings towards Mamoru, and I definitely won't hurt Seiya like that. He was my love. Four years we've been together. I wasn't going to through that away.  
  
"OK, Usagi, take care, call me and tell me what happened k?", called Ami.  
  
"OK," I waved as I headed out to my car. While driving home, I began to reminisce heavily on the way things use to be with Mamoru. It was no denying it, I liked him. It was just too delicate of a line to cross, however. Besides I would not have met Seiya, right?  
I pulled up to my place and sat in the car for a minute. I was so confused. The problem was that I didn't know what I was confused about. My feelings are mostly one-sided obviously. I mean he set me up with Seiya. I got out of my car and made my way to the building and used the stars to get to my apartment.  
  
"Usa, baby, I'm completely sorry about this morning!", Seiya said to me as I walked in the door. For some reason I keep forgetting the boy had a key to my place. I looked and saw Beryl and Mamoru on the couch. I looked at my watch. Hmm, everyone was early.  
  
"Hey baby, its OK." I gave him a hug and a kiss. My body was a little achy and we weren't technically suppose to have dinner for another hour and a half. "Guys, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go and freshen up and I'll be out in a bit k?"  
  
"Watch out for naked people Usagi", I glared a Mamoru. Looking into his eyes, they spoke to me. I smirked and made a beeline for the bedroom thinking the whole time cold shower, cold shower.  
  
I stepped in the shower needing to relax from my current stresses. I mean what did I have to be stressed about. Besides my boyfriend sharing his goods with my family. Everything was so much easier until Mamoru came back into town. I was completely in an ignorant bliss till that moment. Why was he effecting me so? I pulled out the Herbal Essence hair wash and began to wash my long golden locks. I loved the way it smelled. I was almost tempted to make loud sexual sounds like on the commercials but decided not to.  
  
I dried my self off, pulled my hair back and dabbed on a little pink gloss and mascara. My face was pretty flawless and didn't require much. I began to dry my hair and pin it up so that it fell loosely around my face. I reached in the closet and grabbed a brown sued skirt, and one of my brown business shirts and some brown boots. Eww, all this brown. Hopefully Seiya likes it.  
  
"OK, I'm ready" I exited the room. I totally meant to look at Seiya, but for some reason my eyes traveled elsewhere.  
  
"Usa, your gorgeous! I must say Mamoru, thanks for introducing me to my little hot mama", he said as he grabbed me by the waist.  
  
"Yeah, no problem" Mamoru murmured. Was that regret sounding in his voice. I refused my mine to look into it. I had Seiya. He loved me. He took care of me. He was all I need.  
  
"OK guys, lets go." I said as Beryl and I started towards the door. "You look very nice Beryl" I complimented her.  
  
"Thanks", she said, "not to shabby yourself."  
  
I smiled politely and locked my door. "Seiya, I'm assuming you have no gas.."  
  
"You assume right my love."  
  
"OK well follow you guys in my car" I said to Beryl, avoiding contact with Mamoru. But I felt him staring. I saw it out the corner of my eye. Even if I glanced at him, he would turn his head away making me unsure of what I see. 'Chill out', I told myself. Seiya opened my driver's side door and I sat. I waited for him to get in on the other side.  
  
"Just like old time, eh Usa" he said, commenting on the double dates.  
  
"Yeah", I nodded and started up the car. Everything was pretty quiet except for the occasional laugh about the day.  
  
Arriving at the restaurant, we parked next to Mamoru. As I was about to get out, my door opened, but I noticed Seiya was still getting out himself. I looked up and saw Mamoru. I gave him a nod of thanks, and closed my door and went to go by Seiya's side quickly. Why was he making me so nervous? I couldn't even make eye contact with him. I was making myself sick!  
  
We ate Mexican for dinner. It was pretty good.  
  
"Still have the same old eating habits?" Mamoru said to me.  
  
"Yeah, some things never change." I responded to him not able to look him in the eyes.  
  
"No they don't do they." He softly spoke to me. I smiled a little and grabbed Seiya's hand for mental support. He looked down at me with a thank you smile for tolerating Mamoru. What he didn't know was that I was fighting something far more emotional than he thought.  
  
"So what are you doing with your life?" Mamoru questioned. "Beryl here is working on a BA in Astronomy." I raised an eyebrow, that was something I would have never expected.  
  
"Actually, this is my last year. I'm getting a BA in Chemistry. It's been tough work, but I'm sticking it out. I also work at an office Mondays through Fridays and have the weekends off." I said quite impressed with myself.  
  
"Wow and you're a full time student?" I nodded. I excused myself to the bathroom.  
  
"I'll go with you Usagi.", Beryl said standing up. I waited for her. "You know, its nice to see us all getting along once again. I really use to think you hated me."  
  
"No I didn't hate you" I smiled at her. I hated that she was with Mamoru. "But we have all grown, and we're adults now." That ended our conversation as we went to the stalls to relieve ourselves.  
  
Dinner ended shortly after we got back. Seiya had mentioned about not being able to spend the night because he had to work on Sunday morning. We piled into our separate cars and waved goodnight. I felt Mamoru's stare on me, at least I think I did. "Hey I'm going to stop by the store and get a case of Bud Light" I informed Seiya. He nodded.  
  
We parted ways in the parking lot and he went to his car. He kissed me passionately. I wanted more. I needed more. Whenever I was around Mamoru, my body just craved love and attention.  
  
I took the case and placed it in the refrigerator with the damn cheese. I opened up a beer and sat on the couch. I started watching TV. Nothing was really on, but it helped cloud my mind from thinking and the confusion. The doorbell rang. I knew Seiya couldn't keep away from me. I slightly stumbled to the door and opened it.  
  
"Mamoru!" I said surprised.  
  
"Will you let me come in?"  
  
OK that's it for now. What do you think? Reviews please. I still am figuring out how I'm going to play this out. Don't for get for your questions about the story. -Lady Imp 


	4. If I Let You In

Wow, first off, you guys are awesome! I enjoy writing this fic, because you guys are loving it. I really don't know what to say but thank you to those continuously read my work, and to the newest reviewers: Lu and StarLightLita. Also to my seemingly biggest fan Angelblood! You are awesome! And to those who joined the yahoo group about my writing. Still aiming to please so on with the story.  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
Chapter 3: If I Let You In  
There he stood at the door. The epitome of all my problems, asking me to let him in. For the first time that day, I really looked into his eyes. I felt no guilt. I didn't feel nervous like I did when Seiya was around. I moved to the side and waved him in.  
  
"A beer?", I asked him. More wanting to know what he was doing here, but didn't want to make things any more uncomfortable than they were.  
  
"Umm, yeah, sure.", he stumbled over his words.  
  
"Yeah why not, eh?", I laughed as I grabbed a bottle of Bud Light for him and another one for myself. Maybe I shouldn't get to toasted while he was around, but damn it, I just felt like a beer. I led him over to the couch and we sat down. There was a moment of slight uncomfortable silence. "So.what brings you by?", I asked as friendly as I could.  
  
"Nothing, just didn't feel like going home and wanted to talk.", he nodded his head as if trying to convince himself of his statement. "You don't mind do you?"  
  
"Me? Nah, I'm cool. You cool?", I stumbled over words. I took a gulp of beer and looked up at him.  
  
"I'm cool if you cool", he smiled back. He began to drink. "So your doing good for yourself I see."  
  
"Yeah I try. Life is only what you make of the choices made."  
  
"Yeah that's the truth.", he said.  
  
"Wow, another beer?", he nodded and I walked to the fridge to get another beer.  
  
"So how are things going with you and Seiya?", he looked at the ground before taking a drink.  
  
"Things are good. Four years as you know. Going strong. There good.", I noticed I started to repeat myself. I got up to grab another beer. Either I was very parched or my drinking was related to my close proximity to Mamoru.  
  
"Yeah, that's good. I'm glad to see you guys got through that incident a couple of years ago."  
  
"Incident?", I raised an eyebrow to him. "What incident?"  
  
"You know the one. When he cheated on you a couple years back and you had a 'trial' separation.", he looked at me dead in the eyes. The audacity he has to bring that up took me by surprise.  
  
"Yeah, you know about that eh? Well we love each other, and nothing will change that. Actually let me congratulate you for getting us together. He really is the special one in my life." I felt myself becoming heated. "The only person who has ever been special to me. He may have done that, but I forgive him which is more than I can say to you." By the end I was a notch from shouting. My face was flush. My head was swimming from the beer. He sat there and looked. Face plain, but emotion filled eyes. "Why are you even here?" I began to shout. "You hurt me worse than any other person in this world. You abandoned me. You hated me, and for what? Because you set me up with your friend and I fell for him!!"  
  
"Usa-" he began  
  
"No you listen. How dare you walk back into my life like nothing happened! How dare you bring up Seiya's affair, how fucking dare you-" I was silenced by him throwing me back on my couch and pinning my arms down. He came dangerously close to my face. I felt the heat from his breathing covering my lips. I instinctively licked my lips and looked into his eyes, I was waiting. I wanted this, but this was wrong.  
  
"Damn it, it's not suppose to be like this." He turned and headed for the door. I was left dazed on the couch. I wanted him. I wanted to call out to him. I wanted to feel his lips all over mine. He looked back at me. "Look I'm sorry." He closed my door and was gone.  
  
"Aaaargghh", I felt so annoyed, so angry. I threw what was left of my bottle against the wall and sat down and began to cry. This was not allowed. He couldn't do this. He can't undo what he caused. I love Seiya. We've been together forever, but ever since yesterday when Mamoru came back into town, I don't know what is going on. My desire, my heart, everything reached out to him, and I didn't fucking know why! He had his chance to be with me, but he let it go and passed me to a friend. I love Seiya. I love Seiya. I- *-*  
  
My head hurts so much. I thought as the sunlight poured into the windows of my apartment. I had vague memories of last night, and didn't want to remember anything. I needed to study anyhow. I went over to my refrigerator and was about to open it when I thought of how pissed I would be if I only saw cheese. So I backed away to go soak in a bath. In course to try and relieve this achy body and headache, I noticed a small note on my counter.  
  
*"My love, I figured you had nothing in the refrigerator so I got up a little early for work to do a little grocery shopping for you. If you wondered how you got in bed, I tucked you in this morning after I noticed you passed out of the floor. There's some Alieve in the medicine cabinet to help with the hangover. I love you and I'll see you after work. Yours forever, Seiya"*  
  
I sighed. I began to feel guilty about last night. About Mamoru and my desires for him. Seiya's so good to me. I just have to avoid Mamoru. Maybe we can't be friends. *-*  
  
"Mmm, dinner smells good baby", Seiya commented to me that evening.  
  
"Well you picked out the food honey", I smiled at him. I was determined to give him my full and absolute attention. I gave him his plate as he sat on the couch. He licked his lips and began to devour the meal I had accomplished. OK maybe a "Hungry Man" TV dinner is a big feat for some but damn it I worked hard to not burn it.  
  
I smiled at him. He was so handsome. I pulled up a stool and sat in front of him. I looked up at him through seductive eyes. He looked down at me passionately. He put down his plate and grabbed me. He laid me against the couch and began to kiss me. "Mmm, baby," I began. He lifted up my shirt. A look of admiration and appreciation crossed his face. He looked into my eyes and leaned down to undo my bra. With his left hand he massaged my right nipple while gently sucking on my right. It felt so good and I closed my eyes. I saw a flash of Mamoru. My eyes shot open as he began to pull at my pants. I was so invigorated and I wanted him. More than ever I needed to feel him inside of me. Then the fucking phone had to ring!  
  
"Let it ring Usa, the machine will get it.", he panted into my ear. By this time our clothing was removed and he was ready to take me right then and there. My body ached for the feeling. He looked into my eyes and positioned himself over me. He gave me one more kiss as he drove into me.  
  
"Oh baby, yes", I cried. BEEP!  
  
"Uh, Usagi, about last night. Look I just want to apologize. I had no right being there. I just wanted. I don't know. I want you to be happy. I want to be happy I um. well anyhow I was trying to catch you because I know you have school and work all day tomorrow. Anyhow goodnight" Mamoru's voice came through my machine. The moment was killed. My mind and body had left the current situation it was in.  
  
"Mamoru was over here last night?" Seiya asked, not willing to give up on the current task at hand.  
  
"Yeah baby he was." I didn't feel like talking about it, so I feigned gratification. "Baby please don't stop more, more" But all I wanted was for him to stop. I just wanted him to leave. I wanted to just think.  
  
"You want it baby, you want me to fill you up, make it hot?" Seiya asked nearing his peak.  
  
"Oh baby yeah, mmm, god don't stop. Give it to me, all of it." I was ready to put on a master fake orgasm to appease him. His body tighten then he moaned. "Mmm, Seiya, baby." I said, but my mind was so far away. I stroked his head and let him lie there for a while. When it seemed as if he a drifted off, I tipped him to the inside of the couch.  
  
I got up and went for a beer. I walked out on the balcony and sat down on the ground. He was nice out. I warm breeze filled the air, and the moon was almost full. 'Why this feeling of wanting more now? Why? Everything was good enough until he showed up'. I thought about what needed to be taken care of. I had a physics test I direly needed to study for tomorrow, then I had to work. I sighed and headed for my back pack.  
  
"OK" I told myself, "Get it together." I focused myself as best as I could on my studies. Every once in a while glancing at the wonderful man who was willing to give me the rest of his lifetime, then thinking about the man that I would have given my lifetime to. This was turning into a mess. It was around 11:00. I yawned and continued to study until I drifted to sleep. *-*  
  
My alarm woke me up at about 7:00 am. I groaned as if it was painful to be up. I had a dream where Mamoru was laying on top of me kissing me passionately then Beryl walked in. It traumatized her, and made her hate me. I hate those kind of dreams. Why did he have to invade my dreams. My dreams are suppose to be of only one man. I looked to the couch, but Seiya had left. I looked at the counter and noticed a small flower he must have picked. I yawned and groggily headed for a shower. 'Today's another day' I thought.  
  
After showering, I attempted to dry my drenched hair. I had taken a tad too long in the shower and was running late for class. "Fuck it", I said decisively threw it up in a bun, put on some black slacks and a white shirt and headed out the door. I arrived to class just in time before my professor was going to lock the doors for the test. I sighed and prepared myself to do my best. *-*  
  
I walked into my office. Well granted I'm a receptionist but still I have my own space. I threw the keys on the desk, checked for messages, and fixed a cup of coffee. 'What a weekend' I thought. I really needed someone to talk to. Someone who could be a little more unbiased than my girlfriends. I started twirling in my chair while looking up at the ceiling. The door opened and I shot up for composure. It was only Naru. Naru! That's who I can talk to. Naru, wasn't that big of a hang out buddy even though we went out every now and then, but I knew she would provide advice and an ear.  
  
"Hey girl" I called to her.  
  
"Wassa!" she said in her cute little way. "How was your weekend?"  
  
"Good, I guess." I said a little down.  
  
"Wait a minute, what's wrong, you can tell me. I know you rolled, did you get the downers from that?" she asked me while sitting in my other office chair.  
  
"Nah.. nothing like that" I looked at her. "I have a problem."  
  
"Tell me, I'm here for you."  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"Usagi! Tell me!"  
  
"OK, well I had this friend from long ago right? We were like seriously close and we were good friends did almost everything together. He introduced me to Seiya, and Seiya and I hit it off. Well after that he kinda turned on me. Calling me bitch and everything, then he left town. Well he showed back up this weekend. He was at the party.and.and.Naru, I think he's coming on to me. and I think I want him to."  
  
Naru's mouth dropped. "How close were you guys?"  
  
"We were close. But no relationship formed, he was with another. I don't know what to say or do. I mean I'm even starting to have dreams about us. All this over a fucking weekend!"  
  
"Look Usagi, you know, personally, the damage that stepping outside of a relationship can cause. I don't know this guy, but it sounds like what you are feeling is deep. One thing is that he is your boyfriend's friend which makes things strange."  
  
"Yeah, but he introduced us, he was my friend first. My best friend."  
  
"I know, but that changed right? Usagi before you even make a move, if you are planning to, break things clean with Seiya."  
  
"I know, I know. Hey what time is your break?"  
  
"At 12:00, why?"  
  
"You want to go to lunch with me?"  
  
"Yeah sure. All right. Let me do some stuff then I'll come and see you."  
  
"Cool"  
  
I began to do some work my boss and listed out for me to do. I was so concentrated on the tasks at hand that I forgot the time. It was about 11:45 when I looked up again. I needed to pee. I walked back to Naru's office and knocked. "Hey only 15 minutes, I'm going to the restroom, watch the front for me?"  
  
"Sure thing" she nodded and walked up front. I went to the bathroom and alleviated myself. I looked in the mirror, I looked like shit. I opened up the bathroom door, but before I could get out, Molly pushed me back in.  
  
"What the-", I began.  
  
"What was the name of the guy?" she asked with urgency.  
  
"Mamoru, why?", I asked baffled.  
  
"He's waiting up front for you" she said with large eyes. I almost jumped out of my skin. I nodded my head brushed my clothes and headed up front.  
  
"Mamoru, hi.", I said nervously.  
  
"Hey.so. did you get my message?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah I did. Umm.--"  
  
"When do you go to lunch?" he asked cutting me off.  
  
"Right about now" I answered looking past him out the door. He pulled my hand and guided me to his car.  
  
"Get in.", he commanded me.  
  
"OK" I nodded. He opened the door and closed it behind me. He hurried to the other side and got in he started the car and drove off. I didn't think to ask where we were going. The ride was silent. Soon I found myself in a familiar area. Our familiar area. He pulled in at the park.  
  
He got out of the car and started walking. I looked at him for a minute and climbed out myself. I hurried to get up by his side.  
  
"Do you remember those days Usagi? Walking through the park, talking?" he asked staring straight ahead.  
  
"Yeah. They seem so long ago" I meekly answered.  
  
"They seem like yesterday to me.", he said not once looking me in the eyes. We continued to walk until we came across the swings. He sat down and looked up at me. I sat down on the swing next to him. He turned to look at me, pain showing in his eyes. "You never use to sit there."  
  
"Mamoru, I. what do you want. I mean you absolutely turn on me, get upset. I'm so fucking confused that all I want to do is crawl under a rock and cry the rest of my life away."  
  
"Usagi, I want things to be like they used to be, but maybe they can't. I want to be able to come to your house and you not be worrying about Seiya or anything else. I want you to let me back into you life and maybe, possibly, your heart.", he looked me in the eyes with his last words. I felt my face start to get hot, and a tear slid down.  
  
"And If I let you in?"  
  
"If you let me in, I won't ever leave your side again." I got off my swing and moved towards him. He opened his arms and I straddled him. It had been so long since I had done this. He smiled up at me, and I smiled back. He started to slowly swing us and my smile grew bigger as I leaned back and relished in the feeling and the memories. I pulled myself back up, still smiling. I looked down into his eyes, his smile had faded and a look of seriousness crossed his features. His eyes drew me in. Before I knew it, my head was drifting slowly towards his. My eyes shut and our lips touched. Fireworks went off in my soul. Never had I felt this on fire before. He licked my lips and in response I opened my lips to his. Our tongues intricately tangoed with each other. He started to hold me tighter. I held on to him even tighter. The kiss stretched to the depths for my being. After what seemed like hours, we broke apart looking in each others eyes.  
  
"Come to my apartment after work." He didn't ask, but more like he was telling me.  
  
"OK" my breath was still ragged. He pulled me down for a light kiss and lifted me off of him. He grabbed my hand and walked me back to his car. The drive back to my office was quiet. Just him holding my hand in between shifting gears. When we arrived, he pulled out a sheet of paper with his address and number on it. I took it. He looked at me longingly as I went back inside.  
  
"Usagi." Naru looked at me as if I was a guilty criminal.  
  
"We'll talk later", I simply stated and closed the door to my area behind me. I leaned against the door with a sigh. I had never felt like this before. I wanted to explore this feeling. The phone rang and I answered.  
  
"Hey baby!", Seiya's voice boomed into the phone.  
  
"Seiya.hi!" I said as if trying to remember what a Seiya was.  
  
"Hey me at your place tonight? Another dinner?" he asked huskily.  
  
Umm.. listen Seiya. I can't I have to study at Rei's tonight"  
  
Well that today's installment. I feel like I maybe rushed this and didn't get the full effect that I want. I may rewrite this particular chapter over the weekend or something. Anyhow. What do you think? Please review and thank you to my faithful readers, I really appreciate you guys. Lady Imp. 


	5. Nice and Slow

OK guys, first let me start out by apologizing. I am soooo sorry for not updating for about 2 weeks is it? I felt like I needed a break (I thought the last chapter sucked) and needed to think up some fresh ideas on how I wanted to maneuver this story. I have a couple ideas I want to run with, and I guess I'll just have to see how you like it. Now to the new reviewers: Sailor Earth, TommygurlAngel123 cici, omnigatchi, tilly-bear, Lunakitty, and joyce, thank you guys so much! And to those of you who are regularly review thanks! Especially videl621! LOL Somehow you are able to read what me thinks.Hmmm. Must find a twist.Now on with the story!  
  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 4: Nice and Slow  
I sighed as I hung up the phone. I was in disbelief as to what just occurred. I just lied, and not just to anyone, it was to Seiya. He was suppose to be my one and only and I lied! I heard a knock on my door.  
  
"So much for lunch, eh Usagi?", Naru entered giving me the vicious eye. I was guilty and she knew it.  
  
"Well." I started trying to think of a good lie. "I had to clear things up between us and.and.to let him know where we stood." I was looking for anything to come to mind and that's all that I could think of. I stared at her intently hoping she bought.  
  
"Look Usagi.".  
  
'No not the eyes', I thought as she turned to look at me. 'Damn it'  
  
"I trust that you will do the right thing. I know you remember how you felt when Seiya went behind your back" I nodded not making the direct contact she wanted. "It's just that-"  
  
"Look Naru, I know I brought you into this, and I know you mean well, but I'm not going to do anything to harm the relationship I've built with Seiya. I love him. I'm not just going to go out and start having meaningless sex with other people especially his best friend behind his back!" I didn't mean to shout at her, but It's just the way it came out. I believe I was more trying to convince myself more than anything else in the world.  
  
"OK, OK. I know. I'm sorry. I won't bring it up again.BUT if you ever need my advice, please come to me k?"  
  
"Yeah, I will. You are one of the greatest people I know.", I smiled at her. She smiled back and left. My mind began to reflect back on the kiss that I had shared with Mamoru during lunch. My heart began to race. 'Sure, letting him know where we stand', I began mocking myself. I didn't have any idea what I was getting into. I began to doubt my going over to Mamoru's, but I couldn't forget the feeling of his breath caressing my lips. I wanted to go. I had already made excuses. I said I'd be there. So I guess I will.  
  
The day was slow going compared to the morning hour. I began to get a headache and some sniffles, but not much. The thought of getting sick was far from my mind. When 5:00 came around, I was a whirlwind trying to escape out the door. I turned to yell a meager goodbye to Naru. As I came closer to my car, my heart began to race. I hadn't felt like this in years. I hadn't felt like someone was this important since Seiya first walked into my life.  
  
I cranked up ready to go. I pulled out the directions to Mamoru's house and realized where exactly he stayed. It was the nice condominiums located on the other side of town. I had always wanted to go inside of one. Nervousness racked my body as I drove closer and closer to my destination. I was less than a couple of minutes away and to me there was no turning back.  
  
I went up the elevator to the top floor all the while wondering where the cash flow for this place was coming from. I approached his door and prepared to knock and I stopped. 'What am I doing?!?!' I thought to myself. 'This is wrong', but somewhere inside I felt so right. As if on its own my hand raised itself again and began to knock on his door. I stepped to the side, hating how I looked in peepholes. I heard the undoing of the lock and braced myself.  
  
"Usagi! You came. I was kind of worried you wouldn't show." He stepped aside and motioned for me to come in. As I walked in I saw the gorgeous décor that adorned his place. I made it a mental note to ask where all the money came from. Everything was decorated in black and silver. He had classic paintings on the walls with soft music playing in the background. I nodded my approval.  
  
"Nice place you have here. I never thought you to be one with good taste." I teased him. It was nice going back to who we use to be.  
  
"Well thanks. I didn't come back here with nothing you know." He laughed. And how I loved his laugh. His voice. It was like silk on a freshly bathed body. "Beer?" he asked.  
  
"Why not?" I smiled as I walked around his place more. I couldn't believe this was his place. I peeked around the corner to see his bedroom. I couldn't help but blush as raunchy thoughts passed through my mind. 'Seiya, Seiya, Seiya', I started to remind myself. For some reason I felt like an overly horny teenager. Mamoru tapped me on my shoulder and I all but jumped into his arms.  
  
"Scared you?" He laughed at me, lightly holding on to my hips and looking down at me with his intense eyes.  
  
"Not really." I blushed. He used to always sneak up behind me for pleasure, I wasn't going to let him have the satisfaction. I took my beer from him.  
  
"Did too." He smirked  
  
"Did not." I walked back towards his living room and had a seat on his couch. It was so nice and fluffy, it was hard to believe.  
  
"So.how was work?" he asked. I guess he was trying to make casual conversation.  
  
"It was good." I said, really wanting to say that he made it better and worse at the same time. "You?"  
  
"It was a good day.", he simply stated. I turned away from him to find something else to look at. Anything to take my mind off the wicked thoughts I was feeling towards him.  
  
For a while we were talking. Mostly reminiscing on our friendship of old, and also talking about where I lives were taking us. It was kind of nice, but odd at the same time. The more I was near him, the more I felt him, the closer I wanted to become to him. Conversation had died down a little and we were sitting back on his couch watching TV and still drinking. His proximity to me should have been too close for comfort, but I wanted him closer with knowledge that any closer, and he would be on top of me. I stared at the TV not really caring what was on it, but just feeling a contentment I had long lost and had not realized it. I felt his eyes on me a couple of time and I'm sure he saw me turn to look up at him once or twice. The insanity that he was putting my mind through along with the beer was almost getting too much to handle. I looked at my watch on my hand and I jumped up.  
  
"Oh my God.It's fucking 11:45! Shit, um. Mamoru, I have to go. I have to work tomorrow, and Seiya, he's probably been looking for me.", I turned to look at Mamoru. His eyes, they spoke to me. My body relaxed and I sat back down.  
  
"Hey, Usagi, I don't want to hurt Seiya, and I most of all don't ever want to hurt you again. Let's just take this nice and slow, and see where it goes. I'm not going to try to corrupt you. All I can do is feel what I feel right now for you. I don't know what it is.maybe it's the alcohol, but I didn't always drink like this." He started.  
  
"What are you trying to say?", I laid my hand unknowingly on his thigh.  
  
"I'm just saying that, for what its worth, I've always felt for you" He leaned toward me. His breath was beginning to warm my skin. He then closed the gap between us. My heart stopped. I thought lunch hour was incredible, but this, this was inhuman. He brushed his tongue across my lips, and I obediently opened my mouth to him. His arms wrapped around my body as I tired to do the same to his large built frame. I wanted to melt into him. I began to pull him back onto his couch with me, and he parted my legs with a swift movement of his knee. The kiss deepened more as we both held on ignoring our oxygen deprived lungs. I would have died right there in bliss except for his abruptly stopped.  
  
"What-" I began wondering were the warmth disappeared to. Then I looked up into his eyes. Those beautiful blue eyes. They were searching me. They were comforting me. He leaned down and gave me a small peck on the lips.  
  
"I won't take you like this.", he simply stated to me. "I when the time comes, I will explore the depths of your body, but not now."  
  
"." I couldn't say anything. I was taken away by the consideration he held for me.  
  
"I would ask you to stay, but I know you can't. You should get going. You have work tomorrow right?"  
  
"Yeah" I said attempting to straiten up. I got up and my head was swimming with thoughts of lust. "Umm. thank you." I simply offered. He cupped my cheek and leaned down and kissed me softly. Before we could go at it again, we broke apart. I looked up at him once more and turned towards the door.  
  
"Hey, I'll talk to you soon?"  
  
"Yeah, sure." I smiled at him. By now it was 12:30, and I was sober from the alcohol, but not from his kisses. I walked out of his door and towards the elevator. I felt him watching me the whole way. Before I stepped into the elevator I gave him another wave and was gone.  
  
I got into my car and slammed the door. I just sat there before I just burst out into tears. I yelled out every curse in the book. Why the fuck me? WHY?!?! I was supposed to be in love with Seiya. He is supposed to me my one and only, but now I wanted someone else because of lust.  
  
I was a mess driving home. Each time I thought of Mamoru, another car was almost hit from my negligence. I just wanted to crawl into my bed and escape. I had nothing but work tomorrow, so I didn't have to wake up until 8:00.  
  
As I walked into my apartment, I saw my messages flashing. I pressed the buttons.  
  
"One message" said the machine. "Message one." BEEP!  
  
"Usagi, It's not like you to lie. So I'm waiting for you to come over and study like you told Seiya you would. Usagi.I hope that your not doing what I think you are. If I don't see you, expect to see me tomorrow." BEEP!  
  
"No more messages. Press the erase button to erase all messages."  
  
I sighed. I didn't want to deal with this. I'm going to end up digging myself deeper and deeper into a hole. But that was OK. Everything inside of me kept telling me to keep going. I crawled into bed after setting my alarm clock.  
  
"Just keep going." I drifted to sleep.  
Not to exciting, but its something to hold you over. Now that I have laid a semi good foundation, you can expect things to start getting juicer! Please review. -Lady Imp 


	6. Lies and More Lies

Thank you for all the reviews I have received thus far. They are very encouraging to me. Thank you to the new reviewers: babywolfpup, Sara D. and Yueh-Miko (I am honored by your words especially). I am on my never changing quest to please you all so on with the story!  
  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 5: Lies and More Lies  
  
It was too early for my damn clock to be going off. My body protested every effort I made to get up. My head ached so much it was insane.  
  
"Oofff", I moaned as I rolled over and fell flat on the floor not realizing how close the edge I was. Something in the back of my mind said that today was going to be one of those days. I looked at the clock and saw that it was 830! How the hell is it possible to sleep that long into the alarm? I shot up from my uncomfortable position on the floor and made a stumble towards the bathroom. I took a pitiful shower and rushed out of my door with 10 minutes of my awakening! I looked and felt like crap.  
  
On my drive to work, all I could think of was Mamoru. A vague memory of Seiya popped into my mind and I instantly felt sorrowful. When I get to work, I will give him a call. I haven't neglected our relationship this much in a while. I pulled up to my job about five minutes to nine and was pleased that I actually made it on time. My boss was pretty generous about me being late on days I had classes, but on these days he expected more of me. I walked in and opened my door, dropped my keys and went to go get some coffee in the kitchenette. 'Oooh', I thought. 'Some one brought donuts!'  
  
"Good morning Ms. Tsukino." I heard Mr. Haruna say. He laughed as I leapt in terror.  
  
"GEEZ! Don't do that!" I joked with him. He was the most laid back boss I had ever had. For that I was fortunate. He actually saw past my bad habits and recognized the good employee in me. "So. how was your morning?" I asked grabbing a donut and heading towards my area.  
  
"It was ok. I have a meeting going on in about 30 minutes and after that I have a luncheon to go to. All in all a pretty busy day." He responded.  
  
"Cool, cool. Is there anything you need for your meeting?" I asked looking for a distraction from my thoughts.  
  
"Nah, I don't think so. But I'll let you know as usual. " He smiled and turned to go to his office. Yup very fortunate that he was so cool.  
  
I sat at my desk sipping coffee and contemplating the strange turn of events in my life. Exactly what I was trying to avoid. I couldn't tell if the coffee or if the thoughts of Mamoru's kisses were the cause of the warmth coming over my body. I couldn't really afford to stop focusing now. I had two weeks left before spring term ends, and a two-week break before the summer term started. The phone rang.  
  
"Good morning Haruna's Financial Services." I greeted. It was almost the last voice on earth I needed to hear.  
  
"Hey baby." came Seiya's voice. I felt my heart stop from fear.  
  
"Hey hun, how are you?" I asked trying to sound spirited about his call.  
  
"Nothing much. I was going to pop in on you at Rei's last night, but I know how you are about your studies, and since finals are right around the corner." he said trailing off.  
  
"Oh baby, you should have come by. I would have been glad to see you." I lied. If he had come by, he would have been the only one studying with Rei. I was beginning to feel awful for all the lies I was starting to tell.  
  
"Really?" he chuckled. I was relieved. That meant he wasn't suspicious of me. "Hey I want you to come by tonight after you get off. Is that possible?"  
  
"Yeah baby, anything for you." I just wanted to get off the phone. I was beginning to make myself sick. I wasn't really a religious person, but whatever religion I had, I was losing it slowly.  
  
"I love you, and I'll see you then!" he said huskily through the receiver.  
  
"Uh.yeah" I said.  
  
He chuckled. "Your boss is in the room with you huh?"  
  
"Yeah" I nervously said.  
  
"Well I love you even more. I'll see you tonight baby." With that he hung up the phone. I felt like shit. I why couldn't I just say the three little word I had said to him so many times before! What was going on with me? I was falling for an old friend who turned into a bastard and is now trying to win me over. I knew I was falling, and I didn't have the dignity to stop and say that I wanted and loved Seiya.  
  
"Usagi, could you type out this worksheet for me during my meeting?" Mr. Haruna walked towards me.  
  
"Sure thing" I said welcoming the distraction. A few seconds later his client stepped in the door and they went towards his office to meet, and I set out to finish these financial profiles for my boss. Naru had come in and waved at me while I was working. I smiled at her as she asked for the keys to her office and went back.  
  
I steadily worked looking occasionally at the clock. It was nearing lunch hour, and I wasn't at all planning on going anywhere. I stood up and stretched and headed for the kitchen to get more donuts. 'With my eating habits, I should really be fat.' I scorned myself. I heard the chime for the door go off. My heart leapt at the thought that it could be Mamoru. I did a bit of a brush off and walked out towards the door to greet whoever came in. 'Shit!'  
  
"Usagi, where were you last night?" It was Rei looking at me menacingly.  
  
"Good to see you too Rei!" I said trying to take some pressure off of me to think of a good excuse.  
  
"Usagi-" I cut her off.  
  
"If you must know, Seiya's birthday is about a month off, and I was doing some shopping for the.uh.uh.elaborate gift I'm getting him." Where the fuck had that come from? I rolled my eyes at the horrible excuse when I noticed outside the door a raven-haired man approaching.  
  
"Well why didn't you just tell me so I-" I pulled Rei into an embrace and used my arm to wave Mamoru out of the view of the glass door. "What the hell is this for?" My eyes widened trying to think of an excuse.  
  
"Girl you know I love you!" was the only thing I could think of as I looked past her outside the door. She turned around to see what I was looking at, but Mamoru ducked behind a bush before she could see him. She turned around and looked at me suspiciously. "Would you like a donut?" I asked. I pushed her towards the kitchenette and looked back towards the door and mouthed the words 'IT IS REI!' He nodded in understanding and pointed behind me and ducked swiftly as Rei came back into the room.  
  
"Good donuts, here I brought you one." She gave me a chocolate glazed donut, but for once food was the furthest thing from my mind. I didn't want Mamoru to be caught at my job; it would be too hard to explain.  
  
"Thanks" I murmured as I put her back towards the door and myself facing it. Right then Naru came from the back and walked towards us.  
  
"Hi, I'm Naru", she said to Rei.  
  
"Hi, Rei", Rei said extending her hand. "So you work here with Usagi?"  
  
"Yep" was Naru's reply. All the time this was going on, I was trying to communicate with Mamoru who was still hiding in the bushes outside the door. Somewhere along the way Naru must have seen me looking out the door making weird expressions because she turned and looked outside. Her eyes grew in knowledge. "Usagi isn't that-mrph?"  
  
"Have some donut." I said as I shoved it in her mouth, my eyes enlarging letting her know to let her statement go unheard.  
  
"What the hell are you doing Usagi?!?" Rei asked in disbelief. I wasn't paying attention. Mamoru motioned and mouthed to me that he would call me. I shook my head in understanding as he bolted towards his car. Rei turned around and saw a shoe disappear around the corner. "Okay, what the fuck is going on?"  
  
"Ladies language!" I heard Mr. Haruna exclaim. Shit! He still hadn't left for his lunch meeting! We all offered our apologies. "Okay Usagi, I don't know if I will be back before you leave, so take care."  
  
"Yes sir." I looked at Rei evilly and she smiled apologetically. Naru escaped to the kitchen to find a napkin to wipe her mouth. What a lunch.  
  
After convincing Rei that I was not talking to Mamoru or nothing was going on, I relaxed at my desk. This was starting to get messy. My phone rang. "Haruna-"  
  
"That was close huh?" I heard Mamoru's voice  
  
"Yeah" I sighed glad to hear it was he.  
  
"So what are you plans after work?" he asked.  
  
"Well Seiya called this morning and I agreed to come over after work." There was a bit of silence. "Are you upset.?  
  
"Of course not, you belong to Seiya." was his reply. "Well hey, I'll talk to you a little later."  
  
"OK" I sighed.  
  
"Until then, bye"  
  
"Bye" I said. What Mamoru didn't know was that I would have made up an excuse to cancel on Seiya if he would have just asked. What was going on with me!  
  
Work passed and I was on my way over to Seiya's. Upon arriving I sat in my car for a little while just thinking. I shouldn't string Seiya along if I feel like this.  
  
I went up to his apartment floor and knocked on his door. He opened it and I saw in the background pure darkness lit by the beauty of candlelight. He pulled me into an earth-shattering kiss that failed to completely shatter my world. I kissed him back to appease him. He was so wonderful. He had everything so planned out. Dinner was on the table and he pulled out a seat for me to sit.  
  
He sat across from me. "Usagi", he grabbed my hand. "We have been through so much together. Four years to be exact. I thank Mamoru for bringing us together." I cringed at the name. "You are more than I could ever ask for.Will you please be my wife?" He pulled out a gorgeous platinum ring. I blacked out.  
  
Oh my! What is she going to do? Thanks for reading guys. This is kinda short but I felt I should write this! ~Lady Imp 


	7. An Engagement and an Affair

Hey guys, its time for another chapter. Thank you for those of you who continually review and to the new reviewers: Stepheroo, apple, joyce, Miaka Sukunami, and kool. Also thanks to advice angle for her entertaining views on my story and me! Oh well can't please the world, just please who you can. Now on with the story!  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 6: An Engagement and an Affair  
  
My eyes slowly fluttered open as I looked at the clock on the nightstand. It was around 230 AM. I tried to focus on the events that had passed over the last few hours. I glanced down at my hand and looked at the gorgeous ring that rested on it. It was what I had been waiting for.right? I had always dreamed of the day he would propose to me. So why did I feel so odd right now? Why did I feel like I had made the biggest mistake of my life?  
  
I stiffened as I felt Seiya move behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I felt suffocated at that moment and wanted nothing more than to escape. I grabbed the pillow that my head was resting on and masterfully slid down out of the bed, successfully replacing my body with the pillow in Seiya's arms. As quietly as possible I picked up my discarded articles of clothing that had been wildly discarded in the heat of passion. I dressed myself and took one last look at the sweet man who wanted me for his own and left.  
  
Flashes kept popping in my head of how his eyes lit up when I responded with a yes and deep kiss. I could not believe how caught up in the moment I had become. What was I thinking? Just before I had walked in his apartment I doubted our relationship, and now I'm wearing a ring that promises me to him. Once again I was just sitting in my car thinking. I didn't know what to do. I wanted to talk to someone, and not just anyone, I wanted to talk to him. The guy who started my doubts to begin with.  
  
I cranked up my car and headed in the direction of the home of Mamoru Chiba. It was extremely late, I was supposed to be in class within 5 hours, but I wanted, no better yet, I needed to hear him, feel him. I needed to feel constantly and not let myself get caught up in magical moments that don't last.  
  
I knocked on his door boldly. I heard a little bit of stumbling and a few obscenities until finally I heard locks being undone.  
  
"Yes?" asked an annoyed Mamoru. "Oh, Usagi its you!" He looked back in his apartment and looked back at me. "Do you happen to know what time it is?" He was so handsome and fine with his silk black pajama bottoms and bare chest. I wanted to rub my hands across it. Instead I held up my left hand and his eyes grew wide with understanding.  
  
"Can I come in?" I meekly asked. If he turned me down, then I would have completely understood. I was someone else's woman, and I had the ring to prove it. Instead he opened his door wider and allowed me entrance into his domain.  
  
We kind of just stood by the door and looked at each other for a moment until Mamoru finally spoke up. "Would you like to uh. have a seat?"  
  
"Sure, I mean, if you don't mind." I was lost a little for words. I knew I wanted to be here but had no right. We moved towards the couch and I sat down while he excused himself towards the kitchen. When he came back he offered me a coke and I took it and began to quietly sip. It was an odd moment, yet comfortable.  
  
Both of us just sat there on his couch sipping and not saying one word. Finally I spoke. "Tell me I didn't make a big mistake." I looked at him pleadingly.  
  
"I don't know Usagi. You have to look inside yourself and go with your feelings." He had hidden emotion in his voice that only I recognized because of how close we were in the past. That did it for me and I began to sob. I hadn't cried like this since I was a child, but it was all I could do.  
  
"That's the problem! I don't know what I feel. I feel like after four years, I should be with Seiya, but.but.for some damn reason Mamo-chan I can only fucking think of you!" I sobbed harder now, releasing all the frustration and confusion that was pent up inside of me. I looked up at him, into his deep blue eyes. "You make me feel. You make me feel what I didn't know I had deep inside of me." I confessed to him.  
  
"You haven't called me that in years." He looked into my eyes deeper. There was something there, or did I want to believe that?  
  
"What?" I asked confused.  
  
"You haven't called me Mamo-chan in years." He smiled at me and reached out to me. I had not realized that I had called him a pet name from long ago. I leaned towards his arms enough for him to grab me. "You haven't the slightest of the extent of my feelings for you." I looked up into his eyes hopeful. "But you are not mine, and I can't change that Usako. I just can't. It would not be right-" I cut through his words.  
  
"Make it right tonight. I want to feel you. I want to melt into you. I want you Mamoru. Mamo-chan, I need you." I looked pleadingly into his eyes.  
  
"Do you know what could possibly happen if we let-" Once again I interfered.  
  
"I don't fucking care! My body, mind, even my damned soul is craving you! Please, let me spend the night here with you." I was now clinging to him and buried my face into his chest. "I feel your heartbeat. It comforts me- " Then he kissed me, lightly at first. He stopped for a moment and flicked his tongue across my lip. I opened my mouth and allowed him to delve deep. I heard moaning and realized it was my own voice. I was lost in bliss.  
  
"Were you with Seiya earlier?" he asked.  
  
"Does it matter?" I looked at him with the same pleading eyes. I wanted him to take me to heaven.  
  
"I can't think right now." He said as he began to punish my mouth once again with bruising kisses. And I welcomed it. I felt almost sluttish for my actions that were taking place this night, but my heart was pushing me on. All the feelings I felt for him before were coming back to me. My mind was washed with his essence and I realized that I loved Seiya, but I loved Mamoru more. However I could not tell Mamoru that. Not without knowing he felt the same in return.  
  
I felt him pick me up and cradle me in his arms. I clung tighter to him as he carried me towards the bedroom of his condominium. 'Is this really happening?' I thought as I lightly nipped at his chest with my teeth. He pulled me even closer to him.  
  
He gently laid me back on his king sized bed and black satin sheets. I took only a short moment to soak in my surroundings before the slaughter of kisses began again. "Usagi. Usako." He whispered huskily into my ear. "All mine." He nipped at my ear before he started to slowly move down towards my neck, leaving wet kisses along the way. The things that he was doing to my body should have been a crime.  
  
My hand unconsciously went up to his hair and grabbed fistful of it. I felt my shirt sliding up my belly and felt his kisses around my navel. I couldn't wait any longer. "Oh Mamo-chan, must you tease me?" I asked. He looked up at me dangerously with his gorgeous blue eyes. They looked deep inside of me. I thought I saw in them the emotion that I craved. Love. He smiled and went back to the kisses. My eyes rolled to the back of my head in pleasure.  
  
Eventually I rolled him over on the bed and started to return the pleasure he had graced my body with. I straddled his body and removed my shirt and exposed my pink bra I was wearing. He looked as if my body was one of the great marvels of the world. I slightly blushed in appreciation before I leaned down and kissed him on the mouth. "Do you want me?" I whispered huskily into his ear.  
  
"I've always wanted you." He confessed to me. "I never meant for things to go so far and-" I didn't want to hear it so I stopped him with a kiss. All I could think about was now. All I cared about was being so close to Mamoru. About what was going to happen. I began to slowly move over the erection he had developed from the passion we were creating. I heard him moan. With that sound I began to move slowly and sensually over him. He reached up to me and pulled me down to undo my bra. I felt myself dripping wet for him.  
  
I pulled at his silk bottoms and saw that they were the only thing keeping him from being nude. I looked at the beauty of it. It was long, hard and thick. He then pushed me off of him and back onto my back. Any remaining clothing I had left was scattered for the second time across a bedroom floor. "Tell me again.Mamo-chan." I pleaded as he aligned himself above me to gain entrance.  
  
"I want you." He then plunged deep inside of me. Before I could cry out at the pleasure and the pain of being stretched slightly more than what I was use to he muffled my mouth with his. "Mmm.Usako.your so tight."  
  
"Mamo-chan- uh. aaahhh." I couldn't finish my statement as I was beginning to reach my peak. He kept a slow steady rhythm as he slid out and then back into me. He began to move faster and faster until I cried out and I saw a flash of light. "Oh God! Mamo-chan!" I screamed into the night. I clung to him as he stopped to let me recover. He was ready to take me there again. Never had that been done with Seiya, but Mamoru he was still erect and ready to go.  
  
Through the night, heated words filled with passion were passed between us. I didn't care of the repercussions this would more than likely bring, but neither did he. My body felt so right with his. Like a puzzle piece, we fit beautifully together. He whispered words saying how he always imagined it like this and how he thought I was the most beautiful woman in the world. I was lost in him. We switched from him being on top to me being on top, to side and from taking it from the back. The love we were making was insatiable.  
  
He finally let my body go to rest with his final release as the sun was beginning to come up around 640. I moaned at the thought of having to be to class at 800. I didn't want to leave, but I had to go. I kissed him on the lips. He sleepily blinked at me and smiled.  
  
"Good morning" he said.  
  
"Good morning" I smiled back at him. "Mamoru-Mamo-chan, I don't want to go, but I have class and stuff, and."  
  
"I don't regret last night, and I'd do it all over again." He reached over to his dresser and gave me my engagement ring that had somehow been removed sometime during one of our love making sessions. I looked at it painfully. I realized that I too had no regrets other than me eventually having to let either Seiya or Mamoru go.  
  
"Thank you for every thing." I said to him. It didn't make sense to me why I said that, but it felt appropriate. I started to gather my clothes and get dressed. I felt something dripping down my leg in realization that I had not used a condom for the first time in my life. How stupid could I have been? I didn't give too much thought to it since my menses had just past. Otherwise I would have made a trip to the health department for a "Morning After" pill. I kissed Mamoru goodbye once more and raced to my car to get home.  
  
I arrived just a smidge before 700 and hoped in the shower. I was so damn tired, but energetic from my indulgence of the night. I sloppily dressed myself not really caring what the world thought because somewhere inside of me, I finally felt fulfilled. Hopefully at work it will be a slow day and I can catch some sleep. I grabbed my backpack and prepared to leave. I opened the door and was pushed back inside. The lips of my lover from the past few hours were bruising my lips. I knew what was going to happen next. He knew his every command of me would be granted.  
  
"Your not going to school." he whispered huskily into my ear.  
  
"OK" I breathlessly whispered. He smiled at me with those seductive blue eyes. I was wondering how the hell he got over to my place so fast. I had been gone about an hour. His midnight gorgeous black hair that I was grasping at not too long ago was hanging down in his eyes. He walked past me and picked up the phone and dialed a number.  
  
"Hi Mr. Haruna? I'm a friend of Usagi, and she is not feeling well at all. She is running a bit of a temperature..Yes, yes, I will tell here that. Yes.she should see you tomorrow. I just want to make sure she feels better. Yes sir, I'll tell her you said that. OK.Goodbye now." Mamoru hung up the phone and looked at me with hungry eyes. "He said he hopes you feel better."  
  
"Mamo-chan! I have to work to pay my bills you know!" I almost yelled.  
  
"Oh and also you have vacation and sick time saved. You won't miss any pay, and if you need.I'll provide. Now relax." He commanded of me, and I obliged. He had thought of it all. I was his to command.  
  
He slipped my backpack off my shoulder and tossed it to a corner and backed me towards my bedroom. All the while holding me with his eyes. "Usako, I've wanted you for so long and now that I have a chance to have you, I won't give up," he said with almost a plea in his eyes. "Now that you've seen my bed, let me see yours." He guided me onto my pink sheets and started to slowly remove my clothes.  
  
"Whatever you wish." I whispered to him. Here I was again ready to drop everything for him again.  
  
"My wish is to make you happy." those were the last words I heard before he started to take me away again.  
  
OK guys, how did you like it? Things are now going to get tricky! How will Usa be able to pull of an engagement to Seiya and an affair with Mamoru? Who will she drop? Please review! ~Lady Imp 


	8. Making the Right Choice

Hi all! Sorry for the long update, but I'm doing Summer A in college and it is really kicking my ass. Every two days is like a week. Anyhow, I want to thank all of you who reviewed, however I'm not able to get online and tell you the new ones at the moment. The cable company is working on the outage. Anyhow you are here for the story right? ( So on with the show!  
  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 7: Making the Right Choice  
  
I laid there basking in the glory of his presence. He was sound asleep, slightly snoring. Never before had I felt so alive with Seiya. I was close to Seiya, but I felt one with Mamoru, something I hadn't realized was really there in our age of innocence.  
  
There were so many different things between the two. Seiya lives for me and will do anything to keep me smiling, while Mamoru would show me how to live and to step outside of the circle. There was no trying with him. I was in love with the man whose arms surround me, and yet I belong to another. I was in love with the worst person possible, his best friend. I was in love with Mamoru.  
  
I kissed him lightly on the lips and slid gently out of his arms. I headed towards my bathroom to take a hot relaxing shower. There was so much going on in my life at the moment that I wanted to just implode into nothingness. However I was oddly satisfied with the way things were going.  
  
I prepared for a hot shower to soothe my slightly aching body from the excursions over the past twelve hours or so. I looked at myself long and hard in the mirror. I looked different. I looked happy. I smiled brightly and slid into the shower to let the warm water cascade down my hair and my body. The water was warm but my thoughts were on how much warmer I felt in Mamoru's arms.  
  
I began to think of how hung up I used to be over him and finally I knew the reason why. I always cared for him, always loved him. The whole time he was with Beryl I loved him. The whole time with Seiya, I loved him. I realized I hated him for forgetting what we had as friends and just outright abandoning me because I found someone to show me the affection he gave to other girls. I was jealous, but I moved on, big time. Now here we are. I am engaged to the guy he set me up with and he was lying in my bed soundly sleeping.  
  
Or so I thought. While holding my head under the streaming water lost in my own reverie, I felt a hand reach out and touch my shoulder. I jumped at first. Then I relaxed and leaned back onto the very familiar chest, a chest that was not the one from last night. I turned around a saw the concerned eyes of my fiancé.  
  
"Seiya!" I gasped out. "I can explain-" I began trying to figure out how I can explain Mamoru lying naked in my bed.  
  
"No need baby." He said to me tenderly stroking my face. "When I woke, I figured you had gone to class this morning and work. I stopped by your job at lunch, but Mr. Haruna said that you had called in sick."  
  
"Ah, yeah, I'm not feeling to well at the moment." And I really wasn't. If he didn't see Mamoru laid out on my bed, then where the fuck had he gone.  
  
"You should have told me! I would have taken care of you. I brought you some soup, some massaging oil. Usa. I love you so much. I'm so happy you will be my wife. You have really made me the happiest man in the world"  
  
I felt like shit to say the least. I didn't deserve him or rather he didn't deserve the betrayal that was going on behind his back. "Look Seiya, I, uh, I don't know." I began. I needed to buy time. I kissed him softly and turned the showerhead off. The kiss felt so wrong. I felt like I had done Mamoru an injustice! But the only one being done injustice was Seiya. Without looking at him, I stepped out of the shower and headed towards my bed.  
  
"Usagi, are you feeling alright?" Concern was weighing heavily through his voice.  
  
"That's it Seiya.I don't know how I feel." I plopped on my bed and thought I heard a grunt. 'He couldn't be.' I thought nervously at the thought of where Mamoru was. 'He's under the damn bed!' This cannot be good. Seiya's nude form joined me on the bed.  
  
"Honey, tell me what's wrong. Do you need anything?" his eyes were painful to look at. I tried to think of anything that would get him out and away from me for just a little while. He moved closer to me and whispered huskily in my ear. "Do you need me baby? Do you want me like last night." He was continually creeping closer to me until he was inches away from my lips. He closed any gap remaining and pressed his lips hard against mine.  
  
I heard him moan and he pushed me back on the bed and proceeded to take his position above me. "Seiya-" I called out, but he had already silenced my would-be protest.  
  
"I'll make you feel better." His breath was hot, his eyes intense. I couldn't stand it. I used all I had in me and pushed him off me hard. So hard that he landed on the floor with and umph! A thought quickly popped in my head that he wasn't the only one on my bedroom floor. Right next to him was probably Mamoru. "God damn it Usa. What was that for?!?" He groaned out. "Hey isn't this your engagement ring?" He asked me, as he was about to lift my blanket to reach for it.  
  
I dived to the floor and straddled him. "It must have fallen off the dresser when I was going to take a shower." I quickly thought. I was really becoming a talented liar. I forced myself to softly stroke him and bend to give him a kiss. "You know what baby?" I said to him as I sat up and pulled him up. "Will you meet me at our café in about 2 hours?" I put on my best 'I love you' voice I could muster out.  
  
"But I like where I am right now" He said wrapping his arms around me.  
  
"God don't touch me!" I screamed out unintentionally. The room stilled and he just looked at me.  
  
"You really are having a bad day, eh?" He asked as he slowly backed away from me and went to my bathroom to collect his clothing.  
  
"Look Seiya, I'll see you at the café in a couple of hours, ok love?" I was really trying to not hurt him.  
  
"Yeah baby, we'll do that." he said almost hurt. "I'll see you then. I love you baby, my future wife." Those words stung. He gave me a small peck on the cheek and finished dressing. Five more minutes later he was out the door.  
  
I collapsed on my bed and began to cry. I can't believe the scandal I was allowing to go on in my life. I felt warm arms embrace me, and I melted into them not holding back anything.  
  
"I didn't know he had a key." He simply stated.  
  
"Mamo-chan, I'm so sorry. I'm so confused. I don't know what to do anymore." I cried into his chest hoping to find an answer to my ultimate question of what to do.  
  
"Usako." he breathed into my ear tenderly. "I don't want you to hurt. I understand I had my chance with you and I completely ignored the fact. If anyone doesn't deserve anyone, it me not deserving you."  
  
I looked into his eyes, seeking honesty in them. I was not let down. "Oh Mamo-chan, I lo-" He silenced me with a sweet tender soft kiss.  
  
"Be careful who you say those words to." He said to me with a slight sternness in his voice. "They can make or break someone." He had an undecipherable look in his eyes. I was going to ask what he was getting at. I loved him and it would have been nice to return the words.  
  
He turned me so that I was lying on my back and he was towering over me almost powerfully. It was not long before our bodies were entwined in a fit of intense, passionate, sacred lovemaking. The feeling was indescribable feeling of soaring. I felt a few tears shed from my eyes as I began to reach my climatic point.  
  
"Oh. Mamo-chan. Oh god baby. please. I need this, I need you." And with those few words my body clamped down hard on him and I saw the white light called bliss.  
  
"Usako. I. I." He had reached his climax and fell exhaustedly upon me. I showered his face with kisses. I held onto him as if my life depended upon it.  
  
"You what?" I asked him after a long moment of silence and me stroking his hard muscular back over and over again, committing it to memory. I hoped it was the words I needed to hear from him.  
  
"Usako." he said slightly distant. I began to worry. "I. I won't allow myself to feel for you when I know there is someone else." He sighed. My heart almost shattered.  
  
"What do you want from me?" I cried out in a distressed manner.  
  
"I don't know. I want. I want what's not mine" I almost heard a pain in his voice. "You have his ring, he has your love. I have your body, but your still not mine."  
  
"Mamo-chan." I needed a real breather from all men at the moment.  
  
While Mamoru dressed to leave, I called up the girls and told them it was an emergency that I meet them at my apartment now. They all said they would see me in 10 to 15 minutes.  
  
"Usagi. Think about yourself. Go with your heart." He lightly kissed me on the cheek and exited my door.  
  
"Mamo-chan." I sighed as he left.  
  
I was suppose to meet Seiya in about an hour and I kind of knew what I had to do, but I still wasn't sure if I wanted to. Not even five minutes had passed since Mamoru left before a sound knock on my door.  
  
I opened the door and was greeted with four pair of fiery eyes.  
  
"Explain why we just say Mamoru exiting your apartment complex." I could tell she meant business.  
  
Before answering I invited everyone in. We all sat down and I was the only one uncomfortable with the silence that had developed.  
  
"Well." said Mina trying to push things along.  
  
"Well. You see. It's like this." I stammered trying to find the right words but soon decided it was better to just say it. "I slept with Mamoru last night."  
  
"WHAT?!?" came the unified cry from my friends.  
  
"Wait, hold up" said Makoto trying to rationalize. "I want to know from the beginning what the hell is going on." With her statement came nods and murmurs of agreement. I slowly obliged.  
  
I told them how my feelings from the party had developed. I told them about Mamoru and I kissing after he came to my job. About how much he showed he cared for me. I told them about the engagement. I told them about sleeping with Mamoru at his place and then again at mine.  
  
There was silence throughout the apartment. I had only thirty minutes left before I was to meet up with Seiya. I called them for support, for advice.  
  
"Stop staring and help me you guys!" I cried out.  
  
"What the fuck do you want me to say, Usagi?" Rei screamed out at me. "I warned you. I told you to be careful. Look at this mess. You have a man who loves you. You are wearing his ring and you are sleeping with Mamoru! I'm not going to give you a medal!"  
  
"You shut the fuck up Rei! What if I would have married Seiya and Mamoru would have come back and these feelings would have risen, huh? Then what? I find myself fortunate to feel this way right now you know! I could have waited for the water to run dry and be miserable. You don't understand. I care for Seiya. I love him in some sort of way. But Mamo- chan. I don't know. He makes me feel something that Seiya never did." Sorrow overcame me again that day. I was so angry, angry with them for not telling me what to do, angry with myself for not knowing.  
  
"Calm down Usa." Ami said. "Obviously you're not ready for a commitment to Seiya, no matter how much you wanted it. However, I don't like your choice in the person who has brought such and uprising out of you. I can't say I approve. Seiya and Mamoru were, if not now, best friends. But sometimes that's how things work." She commented.  
  
"I don't care what you guys think." I bit out.  
  
"Then why are we here?" Makoto asked gently. "You do care, and we care about you. All we can do is give you our advice. It will ultimately be you who makes the decision. As a matter of fact I think you already know what you will do."  
  
"Look Usa, we love you and will stand behind you no matter what you chose in life. We know you for who you are. Follow you heart, sweetie. Sometimes heartache will come from it, but you will find happiness at the end of the path." Mina wisely advised me.  
  
"You guys." I started to cry once more at the wonderful friends I had. "I sleep with Mamoru one night and I am almost ready to give up every thing I worked for."  
  
"Look, we love you. Just resolve this as soon as possible. You have our silence on the issue. We won't tell anyone." Ami told me as she stroked my hair.  
  
I looked at the time and realized I was to meet Seiya in less than 15 minutes. I rushed around telling the girls of my meeting with Seiya and that I would meet them back at my place in about an hour or so. I ran out the door. I was determined to do what I felt was right in my heart.  
  
I saw Seiya waiting patiently for me at 'our' both at the café. It pained me to walk towards him. I knew I was moments away from breaking his heart.  
  
"Usa!" he rushed to me and gave me kiss. "How do you feel?" He had this hope in his eyes that was nipping at my consciousness.  
  
"I feel fine, Seiya." I managed and gave him a small kiss on the cheek. He deserved so much better.  
  
"Well anyhow, I took the liberty of ordering you a fudge and vanilla parfait." He smiled broadly at me. He knew that was my favorite, and I couldn't help but smile at how he knew so much about me. How he had taken the time and care to study me, to know me. Was I really willing to give that away?  
  
I was. That is I was until I say Mamoru walk into the café with Beryl, his girlfriend, on his arm. She was beaming happily at him and leaned up to give him a kiss on the cheek. I felt a flare of hot, white, pure jealous go through me. But I wasn't his so I say anything to him about it. When he noticed Seiya and I he almost tried to leave back out of the café. He knew I was going to be there or at least I thought.  
  
"Usagi!" shouted Beryl to me happily.  
  
"Beryl! Hi how are you?" I feigned enthusiasm as the both of them approached Seiya and I table. Seiya got up and slid next to me and offered the now vacant seating to our unexpected guests, much to my dismay.  
  
"Seiya, that's really not necessary, we were just stopping in for a snack."  
  
"Of course it is!" Beryl said as she slid in across from me. Mamoru reluctantly sat down.  
  
"I suppose you haven't heard the news, eh?" Seiya said proudly.  
  
"News?" asked a knowing Mamoru.  
  
"I propose to Usagi and she said yes!" He yanked my hand from underneath the table and beamed proudly as he pointed at the symbol of possession. I smiled slightly, avoiding eye contact with Mamoru.  
  
"That's great man." Mamoru tried hard to act as if he was happy.  
  
"Oh my! That is great Usagi." Beryl congratulated me happily. "Mamoru was actually telling me how he wanted to get out of town for a couple of weeks to possibly see his family, and wants to take me with him!"  
  
My heart stopped. Words of how he said that he wouldn't give up his chance to have me or how he said he would never leave my side again popped in my head. Here I was about to break my engagement with a man who would devote his every moment to me for someone who was about to take his girlfriend out of town! I began to think that I was just used for pleasure and I felt like a whore. I betrayed Seiya. I was enraged. I wanted nothing but for Mamoru to get out of my face. That fucking bastard really had me going.  
  
"How cool!" I put on my best face. I looked Mamoru boldly in the eyes. "I was just going to suggest some wedding dates to Seiya." I pulled Seiya close to me and kissed him full on the lips.  
  
Mamoru eyes narrowed dangerously at me. "I am happy for you both. Well as you have heard, we are planning on going out of town. Maybe we'll catch you when we get back." He grabbed Beryl's waist and pulled her close while standing up.  
  
"Well actually I was going to run past Usagi the idea of having a formal engagement party to announce our upcoming plans to wed. You're only going to be gone two weeks or so right? So I'll call you and give you a time and place." Seiya enthusiastically blurted out.  
  
"Yeah we'll definitely be there!" said Beryl. Mamoru looked at her as if to curse her for her mouth.  
  
"Yeah, I look forward to it. We're off. Later." He pulled Beryl along before she could open her mouth again.  
  
We waved them off. I felt so much pain running through me at that moment. My heart wanted Mamoru, but obviously he didn't feel the same way. What could I do? I would just continue on the path that I had been going all along. "So Seiya. Any dates in mind?" I was going to try. I was going to be the wife he deserved. I would never speak of my infidelity to him. I would bury it in my heart along with anything else. I had made my choice. My heart ached; it wasn't the choice that it wanted.  
  
Ok that was the end of this chapter. The story isn't quite over yet, almost. The question left here is did she make the right choice? Tell me what you think of my story. Any suggestions to make it better would be much appreciated. I think I may be doing a revision after I completely finish. Please review. ~Lady Imp 


	9. Walking Away

Hey all, another chapter here. For all of you who are just waiting for the complete outcome of who she's going to end up with, it's not too far off. I have other ideas for stories that I want to post but I'm going to finish this first. Anyhow THANK YOU EVERYONE who has reviewed. It really does mean a lot, now on with the story.  
  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 8: Walking Away  
  
I stood outside my apartment door not wanting to face my friends who were no doubt waiting for the outcome of my meeting with Seiya. Any thoughts of Mamoru were aching. His walking into the café with Beryl, and her smile. it all hurt too much. I sighed once more and opened my apartment door.  
  
As I expected, four eyes shot up to me with questioning looks.  
  
"November 1st" I said as I sat down on the couch.  
  
"What are you talking about Usa?" Asked Rei worriedly.  
  
"That's." I felt a tear shed from my eyes. I sighed and composed myself once more. "That's my wedding date."  
  
"What?!?" Mina exclaimed. "What about going with your heart?"  
  
"That died when Mamoru walked into the café with Beryl. I feel so, I just don't know."  
  
"Son of a bitch!" Makoto said to herself. I could see her fists clenching.  
  
"Beryl said they were going to see his parents and... and fuck what was I thinking? I mean why Mamoru would want me. He didn't want me then, and now I'm a fool even more for thinking he wanted me now. He was cruel to me for so many years. I'm a fucking idiot". Defeat was evident throughout my voice.  
  
"Usagi, you are worth more than what you are putting out right now." Ami said gently. "You are beautiful and smart."  
  
I scoffed. If I were so smart, I would not be going through my current problems. I sat there silently. Just thinking while the girls talked about or rather tried to convince me how Mamoru wasn't any good for me to begin with and that Seiya was the man for me. A knock on my door stopped all conversation, and Rei stood up to go answer.  
  
"What the hell you want?" I heard Rei greet the visitor at my door.  
  
"I want to talk to Usagi." I heard a familiar voice state.  
  
"I don't think you deserve to talk to her." Rei bit at the voice. "I think you should go to hell."  
  
"I think you should move before I make you Rei." His voice was slightly escalating. Rei ignored him.  
  
"Where is your sweet girlfriend Beryl? You know you sure hop around a lot." Rei said.  
  
"Move the fuck out of my way Hino. You obviously have only one side to the story. I want to talk to Usagi and I want to talk to her now!" Mamoru pushed Rei out of the doorway and came face to face with a fuming Makoto.  
  
"Look here Mamoru, you can't just."  
  
"Move" was his simple command as he made eye contact with me. "Usagi, I want to talk to you. Please send your friends away."  
  
"Who do you think you are Mamoru? How dare you come to my place and demand things of me!"  
  
"Because we need to talk about today!" He shouted at me.  
  
"Oh what part, the sex or you taking Beryl to meet your parents? Oh no, no, how about my fucking wedding date? Would you like an invitation? Honorable mention? Favored guest?" I was on a roll. I didn't fucking care about anything. I was hurt. My heart was falling apart, and I was going to ensure he felt it. During my complete rant, I scarcely noticed how Mamoru reached me in five seconds and had me penned against a wall.  
  
"Make-them-leave NOW Usagi!" His voice was dangerously low and his eyes bored into mine with such intensity that I obeyed.  
  
Without looking away from the man who had me up against the wall literally I spoke to my friends. "You guys leave, I can handle this."  
  
"But Usagi-" Makoto began.  
  
"You heard her!" Mamoru shouted.  
  
"Was I fucking talking to you Mamoru?" Makoto was making her way over to me.  
  
"NO!" I shouted. Just leave. I'll...I'll call you in a bit." I muttered. I was baffled. Why is it that I always succumb to his madness?  
  
I heard mutters and mumbles from my friends as they left my apartment, and finally the door shut. I boldly pushed Mamoru off of me.  
  
"I don't fucking get you Usagi. You love me this morning and now you- "  
  
"HA! You don't fucking get me? I don't fucking get you. You come into the café that you know Seiya and I hang at with Beryl on your arm after I fucking expressed my heart to you!" I was screaming at the top of my lungs.  
  
"How the hell was I suppose to know that was 'your' café! I only care for Beryl to a certain extent! You know I do have to keep 'our secret' because you don't want anyone to find out about it. But maybe I should just tell the world, you fucking told all your friends!" He once again had me up against the wall.  
  
"They are my friends! They were actually encouraging me to go with my heart, and my heart said you. My heart has always said you! Fuck you Mamoru! You only care about yourself. You hooked Seiya and me up to bide you time with other women! But you had no idea that it would become this big did you? You didn't think we'd grow to love each other? I-"  
  
"SHUT UP USAKO-"  
  
"That's Usagi, Mamoru, get it right." I was beginning to get as low and cold as he was.  
  
"I'll call you what the fuck I want!"  
  
"The hell you will!"  
  
"Bitch!"  
  
Everything bad that had ever come of Mamoru and I flooded to my mind. The morning ordeal to the complete destruction of our friendship over a man he set me up with rushed through my brain. My eyes turned from the blue to red. My hand came up in the air. It reached all the way back and with full force connected with Mamoru's face. "If being a bitch means independency, not putting up with shit, not being an idiot then make me a fucking shirt with the word imprinted on it because I am the fucking definition of it!"  
  
He just stared at me in shock. "Usako, no Usagi, I loved you from the moment I ever met you. We were young. I didn't want to feel that way about anyone. It was new. I came back for more than anything to find the friendship I left behind in you. But I found that I still loved you, more intensely than before. It's over Usagi. I'm walking away forever."  
  
His eyes were connected with mine the whole time. I knew it was all true. I felt it in my soul. I felt it in all that was around me. It flowed in and out of me. But I was too stubborn to speak, too stubborn to say I wanted him to stay. The seconds passed as if he were waiting for me to say something. And suddenly I felt his fist punch into the wall next to my head. He turned and walked out of my apartment and slammed the door. The sound was that of finalization.  
  
A tear slid down my face, then another, and another. I looked heavenward for any kind of answer, but all that was there was silence. I slid down the wall slowly. I began to cry harder and rolled myself into a ball. After what seemed like hours of crying I fell asleep right were he had left me, right were everything came to an end.  
  
"Mamo-chan..I love you too." were the last words to roll off my lips.  
  
The end is drawing near. Not more than 3 chapters left if that many. Please review and thank you for reading this far. ~Lady Imp 


	10. Define Love

Thank you for your patience.  
  
My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 9: Define Love  
  
Love? What is love? I mean really what the hell is love? Why does it cause so many problems. I began to think upon the word that has made my life a living hell.  
  
I looked around my apartment and saw what 'love' made me do. 'Love made me flip my couch over, tear up my pillows, throw bottles at the walls, and write obscenities all over them. It had been a day since Mamoru declared his absence from my life once again. Since that moment, I officially became crazy. I looked a ratted mess. My hair undone, my living space destroyed, and bottle after fucking bottle of beer to try and dull the pain. I had not made any contact with the living since Mamoru left out of my door. I felt lost.  
  
I saw an unbroken bottle that had somehow missed becoming a scattered mess across my floor. I looked and took hold of it gingerly as if it was a newborn. The wholeness of the glass made my heart ache. It looked fulfilled as if it had and served a purpose. It sickened me. I chunked it towards a wall, willing it to shatter like my heart.  
  
"What the shit?!?" I heard a voice say. Why the fuck does everyone have a key to my fucking place? I made a mental note to change my locks.  
  
Rei looked at me from the ducked position she had taken to avoid being clocked in the head. She looked around my place and then back at me. I just looked at her. I didn't even speak a word of greeting. I was like a Neanderthal.  
  
"Usa, baby, um. I don't know what you going through", she looked at the remarks on my walls, " but, uh., we will get through this." She had a look of disbelief in her eyes along with something akin to hatred. "Fucking asshole" I heard her mutter as she carefully made her way to the rabid animal that was me.  
  
She warmly embraced me. "Did Mamoru do this?", she asked me trying to keep her voice calm. I shook my head no. "Did you do this?", she asked. I shook my head yes. All of a sudden my life crashed on me once again causing me to erupt into a river of tears.  
  
I heard Rei's voice trying to soothe me, trying to make it better. "Oh God, my life.", I cried into her shirt. "Why? Someone please, just tell me why? What is love Rei? What the fuck is it?! I don't understand. I don't want any of this anymore." I continued to drench her shirt with my tears. And there she sat holding me, comforting me.  
  
**  
  
I sat in my bath tub in the water that Rei ran for me while she stepped out to pick up some "supplies". I remembered her comforting words. I realized how lucky I was to have a friendship with her, how much love she had for me. It hit me then. Love was many things, but mostly it was true. Not once did Rei give me the I told you so speech, but she was there for me. I was at my all time lowest at the moment, and instead of bickering with me as we usually would be doing, she is pampering and trying to get me to see that everything would be okay. And somewhere deep inside, even though I hadn't found it yet, I believed her.  
  
I sank into the bath letting the water envelop me from head to toe. I closed my eyes hoping for stillness and peace. I thought of Seiya. I thought of my goals. I thought of how I was less than two weeks from graduating. I thought of Mamoru. My thoughts were abruptly interrupted by my head being snatched from underwater by my hair.  
  
"Don't you dare try it Usagi!", I met the fiery eyes of Rei. "No guy is worth killing yourself over!" Realization dawned on me of what she thought.  
  
"No no, I was just relaxing. It was nothing like that." I said in a soft voice. Rei looked at me in the eyes, hoping to see that I was telling the truth.  
  
"Usagi, tell me what happened.", she asked me gently. She picked up my shower sponge and began to gently wash my back, as I relayed the story of what happened after she left when Mamoru arrived.  
  
As I finished what happened, tears were streaming down my eyes. And Rei was in deep thought. She stood up to grab me a towel and handed it to me to dry off my pruning skin. I dressed in silence, tank top and sweats. I joined Rei on the couch.  
  
"He loves you, you know..", she said from nowhere. "He was the one who called me and requested my coming to check on you." My head shot up to look her in the face. I wanted to know more, but my heart ached not wanting to be dragged on a roller coaster once more.  
  
"Rei, why are you being so nice?" I opted to switch the subject.  
  
"Because no matter what, you are my girl and I love you." She looked me in my eyes to let me know she was telling the truth.  
  
I had looked away and found the "supplies" that Rei went to pick up. A broom, mop, paint, and trash bags. I grabbed a trash bag and started to pick up my self created mess.  
  
"No Usagi, you sit.", Rei commanded. Soon there was a knock on the door. Rei stood to answer it. "About time you guys arrived."  
  
"Shit Rei, you weren't kidding.." I heard Makoto say. One by one, my best friends, my girls, piled in.  
  
"Cleaning service is here!" I heard Minako in a chipper voice say. Behind Minako stood Ami, offering me a smile. I was so lucky to have such good friends.  
  
**  
  
The afternoon passed with everyone cleaning up my apartment and painting over the walls. There was a lot of cheerful talk to keep my mind off of men. I could learn to hate men. I thought to myself that I never wanted to marry.. A million bricks came crashing onto my head. I was engaged to someone, to Seiya. Seiya!  
  
"Seiya!" I suddenly shouted out, getting the attention of the girls.  
  
"I talked to him don't worry about it Usa." Rei said. "He suspects nothing" She had taken care of it all.  
  
Soon all was clean, and everyone was high off of paint fumes. "Damn my head hurts." Ami muttered rubbing her temples. "Maybe we should open the windows." Ha, whose stupid idea was it to paint with them closed I thought to myself, a smile beginning to crack on my lips.  
  
"You guys are fucking retards!" Those were the first cheerful words to leave my mouth. They looked at me stunned.  
  
"Well if you wouldn't have went crazy, we wouldn't have had to do all of this." Makoto mockingly noted to my comment. I laughed. I laughed..  
  
"You know, maybe it's the fumes talking, but I think all guys are shit." I said.  
  
"Preach preacher!", shouted Mina. We all broke into a laugh.  
  
"I mean really, what do women benefit from? The only thing they need from us is sex, and all we ask for is security." I began after Mina's encouragement. I received claps and "amens". "And there are those few who are actually able to find good men! Men who love them but they push it away!" I said secretly referring to myself.  
  
"Its better to be with the man who loves you, than to chase the man that you love." Ami chimed in.  
  
"Ha! You are absolutely right!" I said to Ami. My head was swimming from the fumes in the room. "I may not be as in love with Seiya as I thought, but he loves me, and he will provide for me which is more than I can ask for!"  
  
"Hell yeah!", Makoto said. "You deserve security! We deserve to never have to pick up after you again!"  
  
We all broke into a fit of laughter. I shot my fist into the air and yelled "TO SECURITY!" The girls shot there fists up as well. "TO SECURITY".  
  
**  
  
I smiled lying in my bed that night. My life was changing everyday it seemed like. I didn't know if I was becoming a sociopath or not. After the paint fumes cleared out Ami took time to get me back on track with my studies. Mina took me out shopping afterwards. Then Makoto made me a wonderful dinner. And Rei was just there for me. I eventually told them all not to worry about me and to go home.  
  
As hard as it would be, I had resolved to letting Mamoru become a false memory I had made up. I also decided that my marriage to Seiya was a good idea. He loved me deeply, and he would provide for me. I wish I could give him the same love he gives to me, but as Mina said earlier to me, "If its meant to be it will come in time."  
  
I closed my eyes, blocking the figment of my imagination, Mamoru, from my mind. Blocking out the way he touched my body. I rolled over to my side and a tear fell to my pillow. It would be hard, but I knew I would get through this. I forced my mind to Seiya, and all of his good qualities. First thing in the morning, I'd call him. Let him know that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.  
  
**  
  
I waited patiently at the café that Seiya and I frequent for meetings and dates. It was kind of an our spot type deal. I twirled my drink with my straw. Sleep had not come easy for me the night before. I had a vivid dream of my wedding..my wedding to Mamoru.. I was so happy in my dream, until I woke up to reality. I promptly called Seiya and told him to spend the day with me, after my morning class. I took the week off work, to let the clutter of my mind settle, and to concentrate on staying sane.  
  
"You're so beautiful.." I looked up and saw Seiya staring at me. I graced him with a blush and small smile. It wouldn't be so hard to love him.  
  
"Hey baby!" I jumped up with as much enthusiasm as I could muster and jumped into his arms.  
  
"Whoa! What's all this for? Usually after a girls day out, you come back ultra feminist." He joked lightly with me, pulling me into his embrace.  
  
"I missed you. I am going to be your wife you know!" I said to him. I attempted to lose myself in his warmth, but there was one embrace which was the warmest I'd ever know.  
  
We spent the afternoon talking. I made myself indulge in his every word. It was actually the best time I'd had with Seiya while I was sober. We walked through the park. We shopped a little. We talked about our up coming nuptials and decided to combine my graduation and our engagement announcement into one party.  
  
We bought invitations and ended back up at my place filling them out to be mailed the next day. We were scouring through our individual phone books compiling a guest list. I saw Mamoru's name on Seiya's list and thought nothing of it. He wouldn't show up at our engagement party, he told me himself he was out of my life. I shook my head to clear him from my mind. I looked at Seiya through seductive eyes. I give him sex, he ensures my security. Damn paint fumes.  
  
I laid in my bed, resting my head comfortably on Seiya's nude chest. I let him for the first time taste my body without use of a condom. He gave me his all. He made the sweetest love he could possibly make to me. "I will love you." I said to his sleeping form. I let my eyes drift close.  
  
**  
  
A week and a half passed quickly in some ways, but slowly in other ways. Ami had my brain drilled into my books preparing me for my finals that were coming up in a few days. My boss had me doing multiple tasks as I requested. The caterers and everything was done. The days were short, but my nights were long.  
  
Every night, I would have vivid dreams of Mamoru. Every night, I threw up from the pain. Every night, I would cry. Every night, drew me closer to my future. Every night, made me more fearful of my choices. Every night it got worse.  
  
My grades were posted and I passed my classes. My graduation was Saturday, tomorrow. My engagement/graduation party was after that. I laid in my bed, pushing away all feelings of dread I was feeling. I closed my eyes, to dream of Seiya, the man next to me. I dreamed of Mamoru. Why did I have to love him? Why couldn't I chose not to? I woke up in the middle of the night to cry. It hurt so bad. I cried to the point of rushing myself to the bathroom to throw up. He mad me sick, literally. Seiya came into the bathroom behind me.  
  
"Usa? Baby, are you OK?" His voice was laced with concern. If only he knew my sins against him. Would he still care?  
  
"I'm fine baby. Just a bug probably." A bug named Mamoru I thought silently.  
  
**  
  
Graduation was great or should have been. In the stands were my girls, my family, and Seiya helping me celebrate my achievement. But the merriment was overshadowed by the sickening knot in my stomach. Mamoru's departure was taking more of a toll on me than I would have expected. I sat in the car after the mandatory pictures that my family took. Seiya climbed into the driver's seat and started up the car.  
  
"This afternoon, we will be officially engaged to the world, Usa." He said to me. He grabbed my hand. "Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being there for me. I'm happy to know you love me as much as I love you." The smile I was holding up faltered at his last comment.  
  
"Right. We should get going to our party baby." I closed the door to the previous conversation. I felt a knot in my stomach grow bigger and bigger as we reached my parents home for the party. Upon arrival, Seiya ran to open my door.  
  
"For you my dear, he said holding up a rectangular box wrapped in a red ribbon. He had a weird pleased expression on his face.  
  
"Thank you." I whispered, preparing to open it.  
  
"No! Save it for later." I looked at him weird and pocketed the gift.  
  
We walked in, the room erupted with congratulations All this for the announcement of eternal devotion. My stomach heaved at the thought. I was swept this way and that way. My mind began to clutter again. My doubts started to swim around me.  
  
It was an hour into the party when I needed fresh air. I went to a corner of the back yard where no one could see me. I felt as if I was living a lie. That I couldn't be happy marrying Seiya. I would be better off alone. I couldn't let this continue. I'd provide my own security, I had a degree. I would do this all by myself. I know it is better be with the man who loves me, but It's also better to be happy alone.  
  
"Usa! I was wondering where you went!" He said grabbing me gently. "You're so precious..don't run off and not tell me where you are." The kindness and love in his voice made my stomach heave once more.  
  
"Seiya," I began, while tears were forming into my eyes, "I can't do this. I need.. I don't know. I don't need this."  
  
"You know?! Usa I'm here for you." He said wrapping his arms around me.  
  
"No that's not what I want Seiya! I want, God, I want-" I was cut off.  
  
"Me." I heard a deep voice from behind me. "Tell me you want me Usako."  
  
My eyes enlarged in fear. "Mamo.."  
  
"What the hell are you talking about Mamoru?" Seiya asked with a slight smile on his face thinking this was a big joke.  
  
"Usako, I can't go on thinking I can't see you again, hold you again, share my bed with you again. Usako, I love you." I heard the desperation in Mamoru's voice. I turned to meet his eyes. Oh God, his eyes.  
  
"I want. I want.. Seiya, I want Mamoru.", my voice said as it exited my mouth.  
  
"Usagi? What's going on?" Seiya asked me in a cautious voice.  
  
"Usako, ever since I left you that day, my heart has been empty, my soul shattered. Ever since I shared my bed with you, I wanted you next to me everyday." Mamoru continued his confessions to me, in front of Seiya.  
  
"You slept with him?!" I heard Seiya whisper.  
  
"I..I.." I couldn't speak. This was a nightmare. Everything I concealed came to light all at one moment. I looked to the ground. "Yes" I answered him. I was ashamed.  
  
"When Usagi?" I was silent "DAMNIT Usagi when?!?" I jumped as he yelled at me.  
  
"I don't know, it was a month ago, OK?!?" I yelled back.  
  
"Don't raise your voice to her!" Mamoru stepped to Seiya in my defense. I felt so sick at that moment. I began to throw up.  
  
"Shut the fuck up you bastard!" Seiya yelled at Mamoru then turned to me. "Who's is it?"  
  
"What the fuck do you mean, whose is it? We aren't in bed!" I yelled at him, embarrassed at the way he referred to my body.  
  
"Don't play dumb with me Usagi!." He reached in my pocket pulled out my gift I was to save for later and ripped it open. He opened a gold box and held a stick with a pink cross in the window in front of my face. Tears welled up in my eyes at the realization of what it was. Mamoru's eyes shot wide open, knowing the possibilities. Seiya's eyes were watered and he asked me once more in a broken voice, "Who's baby is it?"  
  
**  
  
I say gawd damn! Just when you think it may get better eh? Almost at the end. Review please. ~Lady Imp. 


	11. Accidents Happen

My Boyfriend's Friend  
  
Chapter 10: Accidents Happen  
  
Who's baby? Who's baby? Who's baby? Those words continually rolled in my mind. If my life wasn't messed up enough already, I was carrying the child of one of the two men who were in front of me. My head became dizzy and one thought came to my mind, run. And run I did. I broke away into a run across my parent's backyard. I just knew if I ran hard enough I could get away.  
  
"Usako, come back!", Mamoru screamed from behind me as he took off running behind me. I ran a bit faster, earning curious stares and murmurs from the guests who were celebrating this "joyous" occasion.  
  
"Usagi what's going on?!", I faintly heard my father call out to me.  
  
"Go to hell all of you!", I called out in response, as I ran out of the backyard and headed down the sidewalk trying to escape.  
  
"USAGI!", my mother yelled after me for my rudeness.  
  
"Usako!" Mamoru called from behind gaining ground on me easily, I picked up the pace.  
  
"This engagement is off!!!" I heard Seiya yell in the background and I turned and saw him on hot pursuit of Mamoru who was quickly catching up to me.  
  
"Usa!" , Rei yelled after me. Followed by my other girls trying to catch me. I closed my eyes and wished for wings as I gave all I had into getting away. I felt as if my chest was going to explode.  
  
"Usako wait!", I heard Mamoru scream frantically, but I was not going to hear it. I was not going to face any of them, not today! I heard footsteps close behind me. "Usako NO!" I was pushed forward hard and landed on the ground. I then heard a car skid and hit something. My eyes shot open. It couldn't be..  
  
I turned around slowly and saw Mamoru lying motionless in front of a car that was meant to hit me.  
  
"MAMO-CHAN!!!", I screamed out. "NO, NO, OH GOD NO! MAMO-CHAN." I crawled to him unable to get up on my legs and covered his body with mine. "Mamo-chan, please!", I sobbed uncontrollably. I felt someone rush to my side. I looked over. "Rei! Please! Mamo-chan, please help him! Oh God, please Mamo-chan I love you!"  
  
Mamoru's eyes faintly opened to greet mine. "Usa-", he was cut off by a cough that produced blood, a sign of internal bleeding. I tried to make him stop, but he refused. "Usako, I- I love- I love you-t too." I heard the sirens of an ambulance in the distance coming closer.  
  
"Mamo-chan their coming! Do you hear them?" I stroked his hair as he barely was able to shake his head yes. I sobbed more. "Why baby, why? Don't you leave me OK? Mamo-chan don't leave me!! Oh God baby, please!" I felt someone pull me a way but I swatted the hand back. "STAY BACK!" The paramedic jumped at my outburst.  
  
"I'm sorry ma'am but he needs immediate care or he may not live.", said the frightened paramedic.  
  
"DON'T SAY THAT!" I found my footing and jumped up and stalked towards the medic. "My Mamo-chan is not going to die! You hear me!." He just stared and looked at me. "What the fuck are you waiting for? Get him to a hospital!!!" He obediently moved quickly to scoop up my Mamo-chan. I ran over to him. "See baby, it's all going to be OK." By this time he was unconscious. "Mamo-chan? GOD DAMN YOU MAMO-CHAN ANSWER ME!" I felt someone pull me back. I turned and looked and Seiya straight in the face. "You stay away from me!"  
  
"Usagi? I-" he began.  
  
"NO! NOT WHILE MAMORU NEEDS ME!" I ran to the ambulance.  
  
"I'm sorry ma'am but-", I cut the medic off.  
  
"I dare you to tell me I can't be by his side!", I said in an ice cold voice that made the medic step back. "Besides, I'm his fiancee." I held up the ring Seiya gave me. The medic helped me aboard and once finding everything secure they began to drive expediently to the hospital. I looked out the back window to see Ami, Mako, Rei, and Mina looking at me in disbelief of the situation. Then I saw Seiya, paralyzed in place staring after the ambulance with his mouth slightly open.  
  
**  
  
I paced the emergency room back and forth never sitting to rest. It had been hours since I had arrived. I felt my stomach quiver uneasily. "Not now!" I screamed out, earning stares from the other people waiting. My stomach settled momentarily.  
  
It was a long ride to the hospital. I watched as the cut open his shirt started an oxygen supply and then got the necessary information from me on who he was. I remember his eyes widening at the name "Chiba" and then the comment "The Chiba??" I was too distraught to give it any thought however.  
  
I turned when my named was called. "Usa! Is everything OK?", Mina asked running up to me and pulling me into an embrace.  
  
"I don't know Minako, I don't know..." I told her. I saw the others follow over to hug me. I was surrounded by them and there eternal support. When we broke apart, I caught sight of Seiya standing back a little ways just looking at me. There was no glare, not even an ounce of hate in his eyes, he just stared at me. At that moment, I was reminded of how a pimples form. Underneath the skin all this dirt and oil is forming then eventually it all comes to a head right smack dab on the tip of your nose. It was time for Seiya and I to get the talk that I had been dreading over with.  
  
As if reading my mind he slowly walked over to me. "When did it begin?", he asked calmly.  
  
"Does it matter?", I asked him. I was going to be calm about this. Nothing could get any worse than it already was. It was not going to help to upset myself into a frenzy anymore, not with my Mamo-chan in surgery.  
  
"I guess not."  
  
"I guess I've always had feelings for Mamoru." I said into the air. I finally sat down in a chair, and everyone else followed suit. The girls were listening intently to the conversation, wondering what had and what was going to happen.  
  
"Yeah I guess I should have known. I mean you guys were very close. I was actually surprised that you were a virgin when we took our relationship to that point."  
  
"It was never really sexual with Mamoru, it was just this spiritual connection that made us so close."  
  
"It's not my baby, is it?", he asked as he looked me in the eyes. I heard Ami gasp.  
  
"Baby?!" Makoto exclaimed leaning in to the conversation more.  
  
"Usa, you're pregnant?!", Rei said incredulously. "And you didn't have the decency to tell us!"  
  
"Well apparently she didn't know until right before the accident." I smiled slightly at Seiya for being kind enough to stick up for me.  
  
"Who's is it?" Minako asked me.  
  
"More than likely Mamoru's baby. As a matter of fact, it has to be." I said looking to the ground.  
  
"As I thought." Seiya said. There was a saddening disappointment in his eyes.  
  
"Ladies if you don't mind, I would like to talk to Seiya alone." I requested of my friends. The moved away talking about the baby and the whole fiasco that this day turned out to be. I looked at Mamoru's blood that had spilled to my clothing and sighed.  
  
"I should have known."  
  
"Seiya, I didn't mean to hurt you." I said reaching my hand out to touch his.  
  
"I know you didn't Usagi. I guess I should have seen this coming."  
  
"No, you don't deserve this. Look at the mess I've created! I love you Seiya, but I truly love Mamoru." I started to cry. "And now, look at what I've done." I choked back a sob. "I've caused Mamoru to be like he is. I did this. And I don't know how he's doing, if he'll live and if I can ever live a normal life again because of it. And to top it off, I'm pregnant." Seiya pulled me into an embrace.  
  
"They always say, what goes around comes around. You were gracious enough to overlook my cheating on you. And I guess, I don't know, I'd hate to say this is my punishment, but you are suffering as well." I felt my stomach start to heave.  
  
"How can you be so nice about this Seiya? Why are you so calm and not yelling?!? Do you see what I've done?!", he shh'ed my escalating voice and reminded me of our surroundings. "Seiya, I feel like my heart is being stomped on, I can only imagine how yours feels.."  
  
"I don't know how I feel really. It hurts, but not as much as I think it should you know?"  
  
I sniffled a little. "Yeah I know. So what does it all mean?"  
  
"I don't know. I mean I can't make you mine. I would never force that on you."  
  
I smiled gratefully. "Thank you. Seiya, I wanted to tell you. Really I did."  
  
"I'm sure you did." He pulled me in to hug him.  
  
"Ms. Tsukino?" I turned to find the voice's owner.  
  
"Yes, that's me!" I jumped up to meet the doctor who gave me the once over before speaking.  
  
"As you know for the past few hours Mr. Chiba has been in surgery. He appears to be doing well when we moved him to the Intensive Care Unit. There was of course internal bleeding which we located the source of and was finally able to stop. Fortunately enough and strangely might I add, there was not any broken bones, so he will be able to walk again. He's very fortunate." I just stared at the doctor. I was so happy at that moment that I threw myself into his arms and showered him with kisses. "Ms Tsukino, calm down!" He smiled at me.  
  
"Thank you so much. Thank you! Thank you!. When can I see him?"  
  
"We have not moved him to a regular hospital room, but once we have, you may see him then."  
  
"When will that be, do you know?"  
  
"In about a day or two." I was taken back a bit. I didn't want to wait that long to see him. Seeing the look on my face the doctor continued. "We want to make sure Mr. Chiba is completely stabilized before moving him out of the ICU. This is common after major surgeries"  
  
"Thank you so much doctor!! I am indebted to you!" I ran to tell the others the good news, and they all gave me a hug.  
  
"Usagi, don't you think you should eat. Its not only just you." Rei said.  
  
"Sure.. I guess. You guys aren't going to get weird on me now, are you?" They laughed at me and dragged me to the hospital cafeteria for something to eat.  
  
**  
  
"Wow, a baby Usagi.." Makoto said in wonder. "That's a really big step."  
  
"Yeah this has been quite a day. A graduation, a dis-engagement..is that a word?" Minako thought aloud. "Well whatever, and an announcement of pregnancy. Oh man Usagi! Do your parents know?"  
  
"What the hell do you think Mina? I just learned today myself.", I glared at her for her carefree nature.  
  
"Don't let your PMS get you in a bunch!", Minako said defensively. Once again I glared at her.  
  
"I wish I had PMS."  
  
The conversation died as we continued eating our food. I looked up momentarily to see Seiya walking towards us with a tray of his own.  
  
"He's handling this way to well for me. I wish he would yell or throw something at me, or at least throw me down a flight of steps."  
  
"Usagi that would kill your baby!", Ami exclaimed.  
  
"Yeah Usagi, be careful of the things you say.", Rei cautioned me.  
  
"What did she say?", asked Seiya jumping into the conversation.  
  
"She was just talking about falling down a flight of stairs.", Mina said. Once again she earned a glare from me.  
  
"Yes Usagi, you really have to start taking care of yourself now. You are going to be someone's mother.", Rei said.  
  
"Rei, I don't feel ready for this." I said a little down cast while digging a hole in the ill prepared rice that I picked out.  
  
"There's always abortion..", Seiya said nonchalantly.  
  
"NO WAY!", exclaimed Mina. "She has no reason to do such a thing."  
  
"Does she not?" Seiya question Mina. "She just graduated today and she has to get her career on track. A baby just doesn't fit that well into that type of scheduling. Besides, who's to say Mamoru wants the baby anyway."  
  
I gasped. I had never thought about that. Well I had, but Mamoru told me he loved me.. but does that mean happily ever after with a kid? We're both still relatively young and have so much we could do together.  
  
"Fuck you Seiya!" I heard Rei yell, breaking me out of my thoughts. "I knew you were a little to calm about this. When you thought it was your baby you felt as if it was happily ever after! Forget her career and everything she's worked toward. But since it's not yours, you want to fill her head with this kind of shit."  
  
"No fuck you Rei, I'm being realistic. Usagi was going to be my wife until she messed around with Mamoru. It takes two to raise a child properly! It takes money as well! She's fresh out of college, with no real job, and pregnant! I guess I could ask her back with me and to raise his bastard child, but her heart will never be mine!"  
  
They were both standing now, ready to pounce on the other. "Stop it..." I said gently. "Just stop it." I stood up from the cafeteria table and turned to walk away.  
  
"Usagi, where are you going?", asked Ami.  
  
"To think."  
  
"I'm coming with you, you shouldn't be by yourself." Ami said while gathering her things.  
  
"No, I can manage by myself. I'll call you later." I threw her a half- hearted smile and exited the building.  
  
**  
  
I went straight home and crawled into bed. I wished Mamoru was beside me. Holding me like he had once. However, I had dug myself into a hole, tainted every fiber of my being. And what of my child? Would it- he/she be tainted as well? What if Mamoru didn't want the baby. I could easily get rid of it. Only Mamoru, Seiya, and my friends knew of my condition.  
  
I wanted so badly to be with Mamoru that moment. I needed some type of confirmation from him on what he wanted. However, I could not get that from him. He was lying in a dark cold hospital room. Recovering from the accident my stupidity had caused.  
  
"I'm so stupid!" I said. He couldn't really want this baby. Not with someone like me. I'm not good enough for him, nor for a child. My stomach heaved in protest. I ran to the bathroom and emptied out the nasty lunch I ate at the cafeteria. I then went back to bed and fell into an uneasy sleep.  
  
**  
  
Morning came with me hugging the toilet like it was my best friend. I couldn't take this any longer. I simply couldn't. My dreams last the night before had me shaken up. I dreamed I was rejected my Mamoru, my family, and my friends. I dreamed the baby would be deformed and needed constant care and attention. I dreamed I grew old and gray before my time. Seiya was right I had another option.  
  
After finishing up with the toilet, I dialed Rei's number.  
  
"Hello Rei?" I asked somewhat meekly.  
  
"Usagi?", she asked.  
  
"Yeah, it's me. Listen can you come over?"  
  
"I'll be right there."  
  
Fifteen minutes later she arrived and when she saw the look on my face, she paled slightly.  
  
"Usagi, no, you can't do this to yourself or an innocent life." She began.  
  
"Rei-"  
  
"You can't listen to Seiya!"  
  
"Rei-"  
  
"Usagi, what about Mamoru's choice in this?! You're being WAY too irrational" She yelled out at me.  
  
"REI! Let me speak. Listen, I know how you feel about this. But this is my life. I want you to be by my side when I do this." I said looking into her eyes.  
  
"Usagi, I don't think I can do this. I can't aid you in taking a life. What will you tell Mamoru."  
  
"That when he pushed me, something happened and the baby miscarried."  
  
"You'd put that belief on Mamoru?" She stared at me startled by my response.  
  
"I can make up something better later if it comes to mind. But when shit hits the fan.." I trailed off, becoming uneasy as her stare harden.  
  
"Who are you? You've changed so much over the past few months. Your deceptive ways have eaten at you and what's left is this in front of me."  
  
"Shut up Rei! I've come to you for support. I know I could have asked any of the other girls, but I thought you to be the best to call. Mamoru probably won't be moved to a regular room until tomorrow. I can get an abortion tomorrow and stop by the hospital afterwards to deliver the 'bad news'!" I looked at her hard in the eyes. "I'm not only doing this for me! I'm doing this for Mamoru as well."  
  
"Mamoru should have a say!" She yelled.  
  
"This is my life! This is my choice! Are you going to support me or not?! Not even more than a two months ago I remember us hating each other! How do I go from hate to 'I love you, I'm having your baby?!'" I yelled back. She pulled me into a hug.  
  
"Usa, I love you. I'll be beside you forever, but never expect me to not speak my mind." I felt her start to cry, and I joined in with her. Tomorrow I would have an abortion, and pretend that the pregnancy was never meant to be.  
  
**  
  
I sat in the clinic with Rei next to me wearing loose fit clothing and sunglasses. I didn't know why I felt that I needed to hide from the world. Outside were the damn protesters with pictures of burning babies and signs that said murderer. They did not understand my situation. No one could know how I felt.  
  
The variety of people in the room amazed me. There were young, old, beautiful, and ugly. They had all made the same decision I had. One young woman who looked to be 22 started to cry on her boyfriend's shoulder. I felt a surge of jealously. As I picked up a magazine and waited for my turn.  
  
It had been about 45 minutes of waiting time. Rei was staring at the same magazine. But I knew she wasn't reading. She didn't want to be here with me. Before hand she tried once before to get me to re-think my choice, but I told her all things are final. As I was about to pick up my third magazine I heard my named called.  
  
"Usagi Tsukino" the nurses voice rang out. I felt like I was being called and lead down the halls of death row. I looked over at Rei. She looked at me as if to ask 'Are you sure?'. I patted her hand.  
  
"When I come back out Rei, things will be better I won't be with child, and I can start over again."  
  
"Usagi, your selfish. You never were like this. You should wait for Mamoru. You should be able to talk to him today. How about waiting until tomorrow, you know?" She looked at me with a glint of hope in her eye.  
  
I smiled at her. "I'm doing what I have to do." I disappeared with the nurse into the back area.  
  
She sat me down for a miniature counseling session. She told me about the procedure, the medications I had to take, the importance of following the after procedure guidelines. I zoned out after a while. Everything was so surreal.  
  
"Usagi?" She ask bringing me back out of my thoughts.  
  
"Yes?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.  
  
"Two more things before we start. Firstly , are you being forced to do this against your will?" She asked me seriously.  
  
"No, not at all. I seem to be the only person aside from one other who wants this done."  
  
She began to write out some notes about me, and explain that I needed to come back in three weeks for a check up. Once again I zoned out. I jumped when I saw her hand wave in front of my face.  
  
"Y-Yes?" I stuttered nervously.  
  
"Are you all right?" She asked concerned.  
  
"Yes very." I said, but it was a lie. I wasn't all right. What was I thinking, what was I doing? Was I really going to take out what I've done in my life on an innocent child? Was I really going to let what Seiya said get to me?  
  
"OK, well in order to get started, I need you to sign on the line next to the 'x'." She said holding out the pen for me to take to sign the paper.  
  
I stared at the pen. This was it. Was I making the right choice? It didn't matter really now did it? I'd come so far in this decision. I lifted my hand, took the pen, and looked at where I was to sign.  
  
"You agree you are allowing the on site physician to perform an abortion. You also agree you are of sound mind, and are not forced into this."  
  
X_______________________________________  
  
**  
  
Rei looked up at me about an hour later from the same magazine that she had been 'reading'. I was disoriented. I gazed at her face and broke out in tears. She ran to me.  
  
"Usagi, it's going be OK! I'm here with you." She said seeing the hurt and pain my eyes.  
  
"Take me to Mamoru, please." I sobbed into her shoulder. She guided me out of the building and to her car.  
  
"Usagi, are you in pain? Did they not give you medicine?" She asked me when she entered the car.  
  
"Rei, I couldn't do it. Take me to Mamoru. I have to know what he thinks." I began to cry again. I was losing myself. I was at an all time low.  
  
One more chapter and an epilogue after this. Thank you for your patience. Things have been very crazy for me lately. Review please! ~ Lady Imp 


End file.
